


A Heart's a Heavy Burden

by LadyofHeart



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Fire Emblem Fates: Birthright Spoilers, M/M, Post-Fire Emblem Fates: Birthright, Slow Burn, also the title is totally a howl's moving castle quote, i had to write something for these two, leo is sad, there shall be no smut in this, whats new
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-18
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2018-06-09 03:52:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 29,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6888874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyofHeart/pseuds/LadyofHeart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Next Update: June<br/>He saw it upon the head of his father, and it looked like a fantastical adornment. In his hands it was light and elegant, still miles away from his mind. When he put the crown on his head the weight cracked his bones and shattered his vision, leaving him voiceless and alone for eternity.</p><p>{A post-Birthright Leoniles fic featuring a lot of angsty King Leo and his many post-game problems}</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Leo never knew how large the castle felt until after his brother and sister died. Xander was always rushing down a hall with important papers and ideas, his retainers on his heels like well trained dogs. Their voices were loud if Xander was scolding them, and even louder when they shared excitement over something new. Now, whenever he saw the retainers they were usually by themselves, Peri filled with tears on most occasions. Laslow had become reclusive and rarely let a smile grace his face, even when addressing Odin (which was rarer than ever). 

Elise had always seemed to be in two places at once. Her peppy nature and open schedule left her to run around the gloomy halls with freedom and joy, stopping by to talk to her siblings or their retainers. Her own retainers were crushed by her death, and left their positions in the castle despite being offered new jobs. Leo knew Peri and Laslow weren't far behind. 

Thank god for Odin and Niles, as well as Camilla. If they weren't here to help him take over as king of Nohr he wasn't sure how he would keep his sanity in the halls that let voices echo. It had only been three weeks since his coronation, so there was a lot for him to do. Camilla insisted he take it easy and ease his way into this new position, but he dove in like he did with all his work. Late nights were nothing knew to him, and on the nights when Odin and Niles would keep him company with their silly activities he could feel normalcy return. Somewhere in the distance he could hear Elise's giggle when Odin made another theatrical telling. He could feel Xander's firm grip on his shoulder when Niles brushed past him like a cat from the shadows. 

One day such thoughts wouldn't fill him with grief and fear, and he awaited that day with open arms.

He remembered the day Camilla begged him to take up the throne instead of her. She couldn't do it, she wasn't cut out for a political life forever. He hesitated, of course, but in the end he accepted her offer and later told Corrin and her Hoshidan family with a smirk that he would be taking up the throne in her stead. He had felt confident, standing next to Camilla and watching the surprise rise to Corrin's face. He could do this, he could honor Camilla's sacrifice and Xander's would-be title. The minute he felt the black crown on his head, however, anxiety began to bubble up within him. He wanted to childishly hide behind his older sister like when he was younger and pray that she would make his fears go away. Instead, he pushed those emotions deep down and stared forth, keeping his face unreadable.

The library was often his retreat when he had too much work to do and couldn't be bothered by the outside world. There was a nice desk in there he always used and when he got too run down by work he could pick up anyone of the lovely books he surrounded himself with. He felt comfortable curled up in a big chair with a new read each night. This night felt like all the others, before Corrin had betrayed Nohr. He shook his head. No, she hadn't betrayed Nohr. She had chosen her birth family while keeping Nohr's best interest in mind. She had tried her best. That was all any of them had asked of her, could possibly hope of her. There was still a sting in his heart, the feeling of rejection. It wasn't a new feeling to him, but it wasn't common either. 

"You better get used to rejection," he muttered to himself. "You'll be facing a lot of it as a new king." He flipped the page in his book idly. 

"Mumbling to yourself again, baby brother?" He looked up to see Camilla had entered the library (though he did not know when), her hair cascading around her perfectly as she approached him. He closed his book and smiled.

"Spying on me again, sister?" he teased. She shrugged her shoulders and glanced towards the chess board sitting at a table nearby. 

"Remember when we used to play chess together?" she mused nostalgically. Leo rarely played chess against his elder sister, mostly because they had vastly different schedules, but when they were little he always went to Camilla for a game. She usually lost, but he was young and revered in victory so he had no doubt she had let him win all those times.

"Would you like to play a game now?" He asked, setting his book aside. There was something off and distant in her gaze, but she didn't look like she was going to say much on the matter. She had been a little quieter since the deaths of Xander and Elise; they all had. But Leo felt something about her that set him on edge, like she was going to announce the end of the world. Not only that, but Camilla never entered the library anymore. The past two years had required her elsewhere, on missions from Father or keeping a careful eye on Corrin and Elise. Her presence in the library felt uncharacteristic and unnatural.

She chuckled. "Why not? For the sake of old times."

 

****

Niles prided himself on many things; his archery, his skills of observation, even his ability to chase away people simply with words. He did not, however, think he was any good at comforting people. Sure, he tried, and sometimes the words that came out of his mouth actually worked. But it wasn't something he did often, and certainly not something required of him as a retainer to King Leo. Some days he wished he was kinder and knew exactly what needed to be said to make things better. He was jealous of people whose words were like bandages; clean, perfect and useful. Princess Elise had been one of those people, even if she didn't realize it. 

Her death made the country of Nohr feel darker, if it was possible. Niles wasn't her retainer, he rarely talked to her because Effie was so damn intimidating, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't care about her death. She was sweet and kind in a kingdom ruled by a lies and aggression, something he admired. His own dark past left him jaded and cynical. He didn't have the kind of power that Elise had; the power that allowed her to be good no matter what.

If he had one wish it was to have an ounce of the kindness she had, because his lord needed someone like that now more than ever. He had known Leo for a very long time, and he never let himself forget the day Leo had spared his life and made him a retainer. It was a debt he couldn't pay back, no matter what he did. But if he could somehow erase the pain and fear that had consumed Leo, then maybe he'd be taking a step in the right direction. 

Leo had been silent for days after Xander and Elise's deaths. Niles knew he needed time alone to think and go through the pain of what happened and so he gave him that time, making sure Odin followed suit. He feared at one point that Leo might never speak again and close in on himself forever, but he saw him and his sister talking casually one morning and knew he'd be alright. As long as he had one sibling left, he'd always be alright. Still, he'd keep an eye on the prince as closely as he could for the next few months.

Niles walked down the halls of the castle, on his way to go speak to Odin about something he'd already forgotten when he noticed that the library door was slightly open. An ajar door meant Camilla was in the room with Leo, since she never shut the library door all the way. He'd once asked her why she did that, to which she responded she wouldn't be able to hear Elise or Corrin if they needed her attention. He stopped by the doorway to peer in, knowing that the royals never noticed him sneaking about. 

"I'm sorry, Leo..." Camilla's voice was hard to hear over the clacking of chess pieces. "I wish things didn't have to be like this."

"It doesn't have to be like this at all!" Leo's voice cracked. 

"I just can't..." Her voice fell too quiet for him to make out the rest of her sentence. There was more talking, but Leo had quieted down to match her volume. Eventually, Niles heard a chair being pushed back and a chess piece put down. Footsteps approached the door, causing Niles to sneak into the nearby shadows where he knew nobody would spot him. He spied Camilla standing in the dark hall, the light of the library illuminating her in an eerie way. She looked both ways before walking off silently to her room. 

Niles stepped back toward the library to see Leo was already working. The chessboard was in complete disarray.


	2. Chapter 2

"I'll have to head to the Ice Tribe soon." Leo mused aloud. "Granting autonomy is a long process..." He set down the letter he was looking at and sighed.

"I'm sure the outcome will be worth it." Niles commented. He had been the one to deliver the letter to Leo, sticking around to help make some of the decisions. "There will certainly be less of a threat of rebellion."

"There's always the threat of something. Not enough time has passed for people to be comfortable with Nohr's close bonds to Hoshido. Some will want to take extreme actions and I have to make sure no one gets hurt." He didn't sound confident in his words. Niles watched him sit back in his seat and stare forth with an empty gaze. He always looked tired these days, but there seemed to be a particular sadness to him at the moment.

"She's gone."

"Milord?"

"Camilla. She left, last night." Leo said. Niles recalled the night Camilla had been in the library with the king. That had been a few days ago now, but he hadn't let it slip his mind. "I didn't want to tell you until she was gone."

"And why is that, milord?"

Leo let a small smirk rest on his face. "You would have tried to argue with her. I have no doubt you would have done something that resulted with an axe in your face, and I need both of my retainers now more than ever. After all, you had no qualms with calling my sister pathetic once."

Niles winced. "It was a moment of ignorance. If I may ask, what dirty secret could possibly draw Princess Camilla away from the castle?" What was so important that she would abandon her little brother? He wasn't going to forgive Camilla so easily for this.

"There's no dirty secret, Niles. She simply didn't think she could accomplish much from within the castle walls. She wants to help Nohr, but not from here. So she left. I do not know where she is now." Niles frowned, noticing how Leo's voice drew quieter as he spoke about his sister. It was only a half truth, he could tell. He just didn't know if Leo knew that. Camilla had been reclusive and unable to heal after the deaths of Xander and Elise. She still struggled with Corrin being in Hoshido and had once alluded to Niles that she felt guilty for begging Leo to take the throne. Everything in this castle was killing her mind, and she needed out.

Despite knowing all this, Niles still felt a bitter resentment towards her for her actions. Not being queen meant she had the liberty to leave and heal. Leo was down to zero siblings and no means of escape. All the politics and drama of being king fell on his shoulders alone now. Niles resolved to try harder to alleviate some of that responsibility, even if Leo had been pushing away his retainers since his coronation.

"Beruka went with her." Leo commented offhandedly. "Selena decided to stay in the castle, however. I think her bonds are closer with Laslow and Odin than her lord." He reached for one of the many papers in front of him, attempting to organize the clutter. Niles reached out to help but Leo shooed him away with a wave of his hand. The awkwardness of the moment faded away the minute Odin entered the room with another letter in his hand.

"You sure seem to be popular, Lord Leo." Niles said.   
Odin stretched a hand out dramatically. "I have the honor of delivering a letter from the grand king of Hoshido, who-"

"Just hand him the letter, Odin."

The blond frowned. "Right. It's from King Ryoma." He set the letter in front of Leo. The king picked it up and read it over carefully, his retainers leaning over to read it as well. 

"It's a confirmation letter." He said, setting it down. "In a little less than two weeks Ryoma and the Hoshidan nobles are to come to Nohr as a sign of support and good relations. There are things he wishes to discuss in person with me, and I need to seek his advice on how to handle the people. He's... much better at it than I am." Leo admitted. "I need to start working on those preparations as soon as possible. At least I have you two for help."

"Of course." Niles said. He noticed Odin suddenly become uncomfortable and looking anywhere but at Leo. That was never a good sign. If Odin was thinking about betraying Leo or worse, leaving, he would make sure he got a few words in this time. 

Leo sighed. "For now, I need some time to reply to the letters I have. You two are dismissed." Niles nodded, following Odin out of the room. With the door closed behind him he eagerly opened his mouth to tell Odin he had seen his shifty behavior, only to be interrupted by Laslow. 

"Odin!" He called, quickly walking down the hall. The dancer paused in front of them, tossing a nervous glance towards Niles. It was so easy to toy around with Laslow because of his shyness that he had become wary of the outlaw whenever he talked. "We, uh, we need to talk. About some important stuff. Right now." 

Odin took a moment to register whatever Laslow was saying. "O-oh! Okay, yeah. Is Selena nearby?" He asked, already walking away. Niles huffed and crossed his arms. He didn't even get a word into the conversation. How rude.

That evening he ate dinner by himself, as he usually did. There had been a time when all the retainers would eat together, sharing stories about their lords and the occasional story of their own. It was noisy and weird, and sometimes it would end in food fights, but he would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy those moments. There was a lot of life to them, and he could appreciate that. The Nohrian siblings would always eat with each other in a different room. Niles and the others had respected that the siblings enjoyed their meals with those they were closest to.

After Xander and Elise he mostly ate by himself. It wasn't as much fun to be around the other retainers after that incident. He realized somberly that Camilla had always eaten with Leo after everything, but now she was gone. Leo would be eating by himself, which was a pathetic and sad image in Niles' mind. Still, he didn't move from his spot to go and comfort his lord. Leo wouldn't appreciate that, and part of Niles was hoping that he would be able to move on without his help. He cared deeply for Leo but he was at a loss as to what he should do. He could only hope that his king got better on his own time. 

*****

Leo flipped a page in his book, his eyes burning from being awake for so long. He didn't know what time in the night it was, but most of the lights in the library had burned out. His body was aching from sitting in a chair since after dinner and the book's words were beginning to all melt into one. He was determined to read about Hoshidan customs as quick as he could. The last thing he wanted was to upset or insult the Hoshidan nobles by doing something dumb. He rubbed his eyes and sunk further into the seat. He practically jumped out of his skin when the library door opened.

Niles was standing there, his arms crossed and a smirk on his face. "Thought I'd find you here." he said, taking a seat across from him. "Did you even plan to go to sleep tonight?"

"Of course. I just need to finish reading this and sign a few more papers. You don't need to worry about me."

"I always worry about you. Being king is stressful." Leo frowned and closed his book.

"I can handle it."

"Of course. I never implied otherwise." Niles tilted his head to read the cover of the book. "Hoshidan customs? Worried you might say something wrong?"

"I'm just brushing up my skills. The relationship of Nohr and Hoshido is at stake."  
Niles chuckled. "How dramatic of you." There was a pause and Leo feared what he was going to ask next. "Are you worried about seeing Corrin again?"

"Corrin? No, not at all. Things are fine between us now." He raised his head with confidence.   
"Are you sure, milord?" Leo sighed, looking away. He didn't want to see Corrin at all. Seeing her meant he would have to bring up the fact Camilla left, because he sure as hell hadn't sent a letter to Hoshido with that information. Corrin would probably fret over him being alone, something he loathed. He could handle being king. He had to. For Xander and Elise.

"I'm sure." His voice lacked his earlier confidence. He looked towards Niles, expecting his retainer to take his leave. "Do you plan to sit there all night?"

"Do you? You know, staying up late can make you sick in the morning. You won't enjoy being sick."

"And what about you? I won't let up your duties if you catch something as well."

"Oh, I'm sure I'll be fine. I'll get some rest when you do." 

Leo rolled his eyes and opened the book again. "Why were you up in the first place?" Niles shrugged, clearly not wanting to explain. The king decided to not question him further and delved into his novel. He must have nodded off sometime during the night because when he woke he was in his chambers with his book set on the nightstand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am excited to write some hoshidan siblings in the future... while i continue to struggle with creative ways to avoid writing odin. i love the guy but man do i dread trying to write for him... he's so dramatic lol


	3. Chapter 3

Leo should have listened to Niles. Many nights of staying up late and stressing about Ryoma's arrival had given him the common cold, a most undesirable thing when he had so much work to do. His body felt hot yet his finger tips were icy and he was plagued with an annoying case of the sniffles. Focusing on documents with a fever was also giving him a headache, but he forced himself to push through. He didn't have many attendants to help him with being king at the moment. After his father's death, Leo decided to do a thorough sweep of the people who worked in the castle. Most ended up being untrustworthy and quickly found themselves without a job. He was lucky to only have a few make attempts on his life after they were relieved, and even luckier to have such capable retainers protecting him at all times.

The king sighed, squinting to look at the words on the letter. Another town with complaints about how poor the harvest was this year. He was trying his best, but there was little he could do for a kingdom that had mostly infertile land. Some people understood that. Others turned their rage towards him with strongly worded papers. He had implemented some radical changes to Nohr that earned him the aggression of many though, so he wasn't phased by the town's complaint. 

He placed the letter down and leaned back in his chair, rubbing his eyes. He felt exhausted, like he had been running around all day when all he did was get out of his room and head straight to work, skipping breakfast entirely. He was also much more shaky, he noted when he picked up a pen to write a response. It was a weird trait he had shared with Elise. When either of them got sick they tended to shake the way an old man would. He recalled one night when he was a child and he and Elise got sick at the same time. Camilla and Xander hadn't left their sides for a moment even though it was just the common cold, like he had now. 

He wished Camilla hadn't left at all.

He was jolted from his thoughts when he heard the door open. Niles was standing there, and Leo was relieved to see there were no extra letters in his hand. He was done with writing letters for at least the next week.

"You look awful, milord." Niles said.

"How blunt of you."

"Are those bags under your eyes the new fashion statement of Nohr?"

"Clearly." Leo turned back to his letter. "What brings you here, Niles?"

The man walked closer to him. "I came to see how you were doing, milord."

"I'm doing fine."

"That's not what Odin and the staff said." He took a seat next to him.

Leo sighed and looked at his retainer. "What did they say then?"

"Well, you seemed tired and run down. Some even said sickly." He tapped his chin in thought. "Now, I wonder why on earth you seem sick so randomly?"

"I'm not sick." Leo objected.

"Never said you were, milord! Only that to others it seemed that way. But," Niles reached a hand out and put it on Leo's forehead. "I think that running a fever qualifies as being sick."

Leo sniffled. "Even if I was sick, why would it matter? I still have work to do."

"That work can wait. Milord, it's best to take care of yourself now before your cold gets worse. Those letters aren't going anywhere." Niles got off the seat and looked expectantly at the blond. Leo sighed once more.

"Is there any way to convince you I'm fine?"

"I can think of a few..."

"Niles."

"No, milord. Now, am I going to have to carry you back to your room again?" He grinned like a cat.

"Again?" Leo said, getting up from his chair.

"Did you think that you slept walk all the way back to your chambers last night, milord?" Leo's face flushed red from embarrassment. 

"Please tell me no one saw that."

"Perhaps a maid or two. And Laslow." Leo groaned and put his head in his hands. "Don't worry, milord. I'm sure they'll forget about it." He rolled his eyes and picked up the papers from the table.

"Fine, whatever. I'll rest after I finish this last letter."

"Of course, milord. But I'll be back to make sure you hold true to your word."

And he did. After he finished agonizing over what to say to the village leader he gave his letters to a messenger and headed off to his chambers. He had always felt lucky to have a retainer like Niles. The man knew him better than anyone, except perhaps his siblings. It was reassuring to have someone left in the castle like that, someone who was willing to look out for him beyond what his duty as a retainer required. Gods knew he didn't deserve to have a friend like Niles around.

He had settled nicely into his bed with a single candle lit and a new book in his hands. Studying history was relaxing for him, despite the major headache that had developed from doing so. He felt lethargic and hot under all the blankets and inevitably kicked them off. He wasn't surprised to see Niles appear in his room, closing the door behind him. 

"How are you feeling, milord?"

"I feel fine enough to continue my work and not be under house arrest by my own retainer." Niles chuckled and sat on the edge of Leo's bed. "But don't fret, I won't be leaving to sneak off and do more work."

"Good. However, don't you think reading history books count as some form of work?"

"I find them to be rather relaxing, actually."

"Hrm, I prefer my books to have a little more... action. But, to each their own." Niles sighed and seemed to lose himself in his thoughts. Leo continued to read, comforted by his presence. His own thoughts began to place him in the past to the first few months after he met Niles. His retainer had grown up with an awful past and a criminal record longer than the halls of Castle Krakenburg. With all the stuff that happened in his life he had never learned to do many of the academic things Leo and his siblings learned, such as reading. One day Niles had asked Leo to teach him how to read, or at least read well. He knew some stuff but it was far below average for a man of his age. 

So each night Niles would join Leo in the library to learn how to read from a new book. Leo enjoyed teaching him things and even anticipated it as time past. Eventually, both their duties made them far too busy for their late night lessons. Niles never failed to show his appreciation, however, whether it be by reading a large book in his off time or picking up novels that Leo had previously finished just so they could hold a conversation about it. Leo would be lying if he said he didn't miss those late nights in the library. There was never a dull conversation when Niles was nearby, and that was something he could appreciate when he spent most of his life talking to stiff nobles with ulterior motives. 

"Odin should be returning soon." Niles said suddenly, dragging Leo from his nostalgic thoughts.

"Hm? Oh, yes. Probably by nightfall." Earlier that morning Leo had sent Odin out to meet the retainers of king Ryoma, Saizo and Kagero. The two ninjas were coming early to help set up the defenses for Ryoma's arrival to Castle Krakenburg. Odin was sent to make sure they arrived in one piece.

"I must say, I was surprised that you sent one of your retainers and not someone else." Niles said.

"And why is that?" Leo put his book to the side, perplexed.

"If I'm being honest, milord, you've been giving Odin and I far less work to do. In fact, I've had so much free time lately that I don't even know what to do. Is there a reason for this?"

"I-I have been giving you the work you always get. Your normal duties as a king's retainer." 

Niles shook his head. "I've been watching. Slowly, but surely, you've been taking on those duties yourself. Doing more work than you should, shouldering everything." He stared at his lord with a sad expression. 

Leo couldn't bare to look at him. It was so rare for Niles to show any real emotion and to think that he had evoked a negative one pained him. "I just... I feel less useless when there is more to do. I need to be doing things, constantly. Not just sitting here and resting. I have to do something."

"I think it's more than that. You're afraid we're going to leave you like Camilla and Corrin."

"That's not...!" Leo stopped himself. That was mostly it. He had been wondering each night if he would wake up with a letter from his retainers saying they left to better pursuits and happier lives. If it made them happy to leave, he wouldn't stop them. But it had become his greatest nightmare over the weeks.

"Leo," He looked up at his retainer. "I'm not going anywhere. You've done so much for me and I am nowhere near done paying the debt. I promise that."

"I know that, Niles." He rubbed his eyes, exhaustion flooding over him. "I know that." He felt Niles take the book away from him and place the blanket back on him.

"It's best to sweat out a fever."

"I know that, too."

"Of course, milord." Leo watched Niles flip through the pages of the book curiously. "It's been a while since I've read a book this big."

"Why not read it now? You might find it interesting."

"You know what? I think I shall." He flipped back to the first page. "But I'll read it here, to make sure you're resting."

"I'm already in bed, what more do you want?"

Niles chuckled. "Go to sleep. I heard that they'll be preparing beef stew for your dinner." Leo must have made a face of pure ecstasy because Niles burst into another fit of laughter. The king couldn't help but smile at the joyous noise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was incredibly fun to write.


	4. Chapter 4

Niles wasn't a morning person. He didn't know anyone in Nohr who was a morning person. All the morning people probably migrated to Hoshido, where they could actually see the sun most days. Of course, he wasn't going to complain about the early hour to anyone. He was far too busy waiting for the Hoshidan royals to arrive at the walls of Windmire, keeping a close eye on the crowd that had built up to greet them. From his vantage on a rooftop, things appeared to be fine. Leo would make an appearance too, just to greet them and lead them to the banquet that would be held that night in the castle. 

Niles knew that Saizo and Kagero were also nearby, but he couldn't spot them. Ninjas were scary folk, he decided, and perhaps it was for the best that he couldn't see them because that meant no one else would either. Odin was somewhere down with the crowd, doing a less amazing job of hiding compared to their guests. Other guards lined the road that the Hoshidans would walk down, their swords at the ready. Last he checked there had even been a few wyverns in the sky. Some people were very satisfied with the amount of security while others felt it was too much and that the king was being paranoid. Niles had to agree with the former.

He idly played with the string on his bow while he awaited the Hoshidan's arrival. Last he had seen Leo, the king had been wracked with nerves, even though he never expressed it verbally. There wasn't much Niles or Odin could say to calm him and he eventually dismissed them when their efforts bordered annoying. He looked to the entrance of the walls where Leo would be appearing. Selena and Laslow were supposed to accompany him. There were many reasons for this, such as Odin and Niles being more useful for long range than the two mercenaries who were better with swords than anything else. Another was that Leo felt it was appropriate to have the retainers of Xander and Camilla by his side when his own had to be elsewhere. 

Finally, he spotted movement way down the road. The Hoshidan royals were no longer in the carriages that had been used to escort them, but were instead walking on foot to greet the castle walls. Other Hoshidan nobles and big shots were traveling with them, eager to make an appearance at such an important event. He readied his bow just in case something started, but he felt oddly confident that things would go smoothly. After all, the Hoshidan family had visited once before for Leo's coronation and enough time had passed that the more reasonable people of Nohr had learned to accept the new relationship between Hoshido and Nohr. Still, there were some aggressive groups out there. Leo couldn't make miracles happen and end the hatred over night, though he was certainly trying.

Farther and farther, the Hoshidans walked down the road with their own retainers by their side. Niles spotted Corrin chatting easily with Takumi and Sakura, trailing behind Ryoma. Hinoka, as far as Niles knew, was to be staying in Hoshido to make sure nothing happened the king's absence. He saw a glimpse of Saizo out of the corner of his eye, but just as quickly the ninja was gone. He looked back to the Hoshidans, trailing the group carefully. 

Finally, they were at the walls where King Leo stood, his hands behind his back like always and the Nohrian crown upon his head. Inside the castle, Leo never wore the crown unless he was addressing visitors. It was weird to see it now and Niles had a feeling he would never get used to it, let alone the long cape that came with the attire of king. That crown and cape had caused so much struggle and pain for his lord that he wished he could just take it to the darkest parts of Nohr and discard it forever. But he knew very well that crown or not, Leo was going to be king of Nohr until his last breath. 

Leo's presence seemed to be well received by most, until a minor group in the crowd burst into boos and jeers. Their voices were loud and drew in attention, especially since the rest of the crowd had been respectfully silent. Niles was ready to defend his lord at all costs, but he realized the group wasn't being violent or harmful to anyone. They were just shouting their opinion. It was unfortunate that he couldn't put arrows through them for having dumb opinions and making a scene in front of the king. He couldn't see the expression on Leo's face clearly, but he imagined the king wasn't going to show much emotion. He was very good at that.

The minor interruption didn't last long as guards below began to peacefully break the group up. Niles figured that if Garon had still been king, each and everyone of those people would have been rounded up and killed for 'dangerous' behavior. Ryoma and the others continued down their path until they were safely inside the walls of Windmire, whatever words exchanged from him to Leo inaudible to Niles. He followed after, his day feeling soiled after witnessing that group's reaction.

He didn't try to dwell on it, however, for there was much more work to be done. The banquet was to be well guarded by others and he was supposed to make an appearance by Leo's side with Odin. There was a lot of set up waiting to be done and the job wasn't going to do itself.

*****

Leo felt much more comfortable at the banquet with his retainers by his side. Or rather, retainer. Odin had been swept away in a conversation with Laslow and Selena almost the minute the entire event started. He knew the three were close but lately it felt like Odin was favoring their company to Leo's, and whatever they were talking about they clearly did not want anyone to overhear. He wasn't jealous or upset, but his mind would go through a list of what possible secrets they were keeping, each thought more dark than the last. 

He looked around the room and figured banquet didn't sound like an accurate term. He felt as though a banquet would have them all sitting down at one large table with quiet conversation. This was more of a welcome party, were nobles and retainers interacted freely, no matter their origin. He preferred this much more because he could easily lose sight of Corrin in the crowd and avoid talking to her. If things went well he might be able to avoid her for the entire night.

"Oh, hello King Leo." The second prince of Hoshido said, suddenly approaching him with a happy greeting. Upon seeing Takumi he recalled vaguely how Corrin said they would have been great friends had things been different; that they could still be great friends. After getting over their initial rivalry he had no idea that she was speaking the truth, had things only been different. Trying to talk to the prince only made him upset, and some invisible barrier kept him from getting close to him. Maybe he saw too much of himself in Takumi. Maybe he was jealous. They weren't emotions that he liked to dwell on, especially in the presence of said prince.

"Hello, Prince Takumi." He said, already knowing the conversation was going to be agonizingly polite and slow. And it was. They made small talk that neither of them were accustomed to and forced themselves to keep their pride down if one said something that bothered the other. Leo noticed Niles slink away mid conversation, his eyes trained on something else. He only vaguely cared and tried to follow where his retainer was going without appearing rude to Takumi. He contained his shock when he saw Niles had struck up conversation with Corrin and the Nohrian knight that had joined her on her journey, Silas. Or at least, he thought he contained his shock.

"Is something wrong?" Takumi asked, crossing his arms. He turned to see where Leo was looking. "Oh, Corrin and Silas. Are you going to... talk to Corrin?" Leo looked back at Takumi and titled his head. The young prince huffed like it was obvious. "She was talking during the entire trip about how excited she was to see you and Princess Camilla again."

Leo frowned and looked away. Ryoma's first question had been the whereabouts of Camilla when he arrived, and Leo had told him the truth, hoping he wouldn't tell Corrin. 

"Don't worry," Takumi said, "Ryoma already told me about Princess Camilla."

"Did he tell Corrin?"

"No, of course not. He thinks that you should. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't send a letter or something when she first left." Leo sighed, letting his shoulders sag and head lower despite being in a formal event. "Uh, we can always tell her for you if your too busy."

"No, it's fine. I'll tell her." Takumi shrugged his shoulders with indifference. Niles finally wandered back to Leo's side, completely ignoring the glare Leo was sending his way. Takumi seemed to take it as a cue to leave and talk to his own retainers. 

"What were you talking to Corrin about?" Leo asked Niles casually. Other Hoshidan and Nohrian nobles mingled around them, excited to be making a presence at such an important banquet. 

"Just the normal conversational stuff. Nothing to worry about, milord." Niles shrugged. Leo would have asked more questions if Ryoma hadn't approached them at that moment. With his luck the king would leave only for Corrin to finally try to ask him questions. And yet, oddly enough, the king of Hoshido had a much more serious look on his face than the rest of the party and asked that he and Leo begin discussing certain matters in private. So, bidding his retainer farewell, Leo joined him on a walk outside.

It was nerve wracking to walk next to someone has intimidating as Ryoma. The older man walked in confident strides (it reminded him of Xander) and kept a quiet air around them for a while. There wasn't even small talk that Leo could try to push through. Just silence and footsteps. He had to stop himself from sighing in relief when Ryoma finally talked.

"I must say, what I saw this morning while entering Windmire startled me."

"Oh," It was a less than splendid response. "There have been groups here and there who oppose me for one reason or another. Not everyone can agree with what I've been doing. Some think I'm being too slow or too quick in reformation. Others preferred my father's way. Some despise the fact that it is still a child of King Garon that runs the throne. I guess they think that the linked blood makes me an ill fit for the throne." He sighed and straightened his back, reminding himself he was in the presence of another king.

"I see. I'm sure these groups will quiet down over time but it's worrisome, nonetheless." Ryoma cleared his throat. "It will be hard to handle such matters by yourself, and I understand that you are still trying to rebuild your staff. On the behalf of Hoshido, I feel it would be beneficial to both of us if you had another hand that tried to help calm the people."

"That would be helpful, certainly. It can be difficult to juggle so many things at once."

"As I thought. Which is why I'd like one of my newest Hoshidan diplomats to support you for the next few months, if you would have her."

Leo raised a questioning eyebrow. "And who is this 'her' you have in mind?"

"My youngest sister, Sakura. She has been studying to help support both countries and could be a great aid in your struggles."

Leo thought about it for a moment. He hadn't talked much with Sakura because of her timidness and the very few encounters they had. He knew, however, that she had a very kind heart and heard the most appreciation for her than any of the other Hoshidan siblings when it came with her ability to handle the people. He was reminded quickly of Elise and how she had been the most charming and friendly out of all of them. Gods, he missed her.

"If you see it as beneficial, I will gladly have Princess Sakura aid in Nohr's rebuilding."

Ryoma smiled a rare smile. "Good. It would also be good for your health, I imagine." Leo felt completely caught off guard by that statement, and Ryoma knew it. "I don't wish to be rude, but you do not look well, King Leo. I can't imagine things have been easy here in Nohr, but Corrin cares about you too much for the rest of us not to help."

"I have been fine." Leo lied.

"We both know the stress of our title. I understand entirely, which is why I don't want to see someone so young crumble when there are many who will support them." Leo figured Ryoma's inner big brother was coming out. After all, everyone drew parallels between him and Takumi, it was no secret. Ryoma probably saw his own little brother in Leo and felt the need to step in.   
"I promise that I've been fine."

"Corrin said-"

"What does Corrin know about me?" He snapped. He regretted it instantly and was filled with a deep fear when he looked to Ryoma. He certainly did not need to make the new relationship between Nohr and Hoshido become sour just because he couldn't get a grip. He was even half expecting for Ryoma to unleash the scary samurai he had been told about with the mighty Rajinto in his hand. Instead, his expression was filled with a mixture of surprise and pity. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine. Though I think I'll be returning to the rest of the evening. Will you be coming?"

"In a moment, yes."

*****

Niles had watched the exchange between Ryoma and Leo the entire time. He was very good at hiding and keeping quiet. To this day he was the only retainer in the castle who could sneak up on any of the Nohrian siblings without being noticed. It was something he prided himself with. He had been close enough to the kings to hear the conversation and was a little surprised to hear Leo act so bitterly to Corrin. He knew things were still rocky between the two siblings and it made him mad to think that someone once so close to Leo had left him alone. 

The retainer watched Ryoma walk back alone, Leo standing completely still in the courtyard. He heard distant talking at the door back inside and was surprised to see Corrin herself walking past Ryoma to talk to Leo. 

"Leo!" She called, waving happily. "I haven't talk to you all day! What were you talking to Ryoma about?" He saw his lord visibly stiffened when he heard Corrin's voice and he turned to face her. "Is something wrong?" She asked, her voice dropping to a more serious tone.

"Things are fine. I should head back inside; it wouldn't be right for me to miss out on the rest of the evening." He walked past her before she could even stop him and disappeared into the night. She sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"I didn't even get to ask him where Camilla is..." Niles heard her mumble. Seeing as both kings were gone, he found it safe to step out of the shadows and approach the Hoshidan princess. She saw him and an immediate scowl came upon her pretty face. "Hello again, Niles."

"Hello, Princess Corrin." He grinned, recalling their earlier conversation. Some where in between the innuendos and flirting he may have implied she was a horrible sister to Leo, and she certainly did not enjoy such an accusation. "Out for an evening stroll? Nohr can be dangerous, even in the castle courtyard. It's filled with dark shadows and meticulous criminals, the kind that Hoshido could never, ever house because it's too good for that."

"Oh please, quit painting me like some racist bigot. I was raised in Nohr. I don't hate Nohrians or fear them." She placed her hands on her hips. "I just chose to follow my heart."

"And look at where that's gotten you." Somewhere deep down Niles knew he was being unreasonable and cruel to her, but he really didn't care. Half of Leo's problems were because of everything Corrin had chosen. Maybe she didn't realize that her choices affected more than just herself. "Besides, if I recall you were raised in a box."

"And I'm sure you came from the gutter." She hissed. "Ugh, whatever. I'm not here to listen to you be a jerk. Do you know where Camilla is?"

"Princess Camilla? It's not my place to say, I'm afraid. Why don't you go ask Lord Leo?"

"Were you not watching that debacle from the shadows?" She asked. "Clearly, he's not in the mood to speak to me. He seemed so much better at Ryoma's coronation..." She mused.

"That was before his own coronation." Niles reminded her. The anger left her face and she let her hands fall to her side.

"Right... of course." She heaved a sigh before deciding to leave Niles and head back to her Hoshidan family. He followed shortly after, searching through the sea of people for someone to talk to. Leo seemed to be entertaining a conversation with Sakura and Takumi, but he looked too tired to be holding any sort of meaningful interaction with them. Oddly enough, Odin, Laslow and Selena were nowhere in sight. He liked to let his imagination think of what they were up to. With few options left, he decided to get himself more acquainted with Takumi's retainers. They seemed like a fun duo.

The banquet came and went (Takumi's retainers were no fun) and Niles found himself staring at the wall of his room. The Hoshidans were sleeping in guest rooms in the castle and he heard the footsteps of maids rush back and forth to make sure all guests were sleeping comfortably. Sleep wasn't coming easy to him this night, though he figured it was because he still felt energized from the party. He was still up late in the night to the point where he no longer heard the maids rushing about. Deciding that sleep would be futile, he got up to head to the library. When he saw a dim light from under the door, he knew that Leo was probably up and working.

He entered without knocking, knowing that his lord would be too far in the back of the library to hear it anyway. He walked through rows of bookcases before finally seeing Leo seated at his desk, mulling over a stack of papers. He leaned against one of the bookcases carefully.

"It's pretty late to be doing work, milord." He said. Leo flinched and looked up from his work, blushing with embarrassment. 

"I didn't see you there, Niles. What are you doing here?"

"Couldn't sleep. Figured I would spend some time in the library."

"Oh. Well, don't let my presence stop you from staying." Leo said, looking back down at his work. Niles watched him for a moment; each flick of his wrist when he finished the end of the page while writing or the way his amber eyes would dart back and forth. They were minute details he always noticed and he wasn't sure why. The blond sighed suddenly, reclining in his seat and running a hand through his hair. It was an oddly attractive gesture, but Niles didn't dwell on it.

"Something bothering you, milord?"

"Mm, just the same old stuff. It never gets easier, does it?" The loneliness and sadness in his eyes tugged at something in Niles' heart.

"Perhaps not, but I'm always willing to help."

"Of course. And I'm very grateful for that." Leo smiled at him. "It helps to know someone will be here to help me."

"Every step of the way, milord." Niles noticed how fond he had become of Leo's smiles, especially since they had been more rare by the day. He wondered if that was an odd thing to think about. "Though, as a piece of help, I think you should get some sleep. We don't want a repeat of last time." he teased.

Leo rolled his eyes but got up from his seat, much to Niles' shock. "You're right, I might as well get some rest when I can. Apparently I look so tired that King Ryoma even pointed it out." He chuckled. "Do I really look that bad?"

"Nothing that a few more days of rest can't fix. You're still shaking off your illness, need I remind you." 

"Right. How could I forget when I had you and Odin telling me to stay in bed one day more?"

Niles laughed, recalling how Odin had made a nearly hour long soliloquy as to why Leo should rest more. In the end, it didn't work and Leo ended up staying up even later than normal because of the time he lost listening to his retainer. 

"It was all with good intentions, milord." He said, walking with him through the library. He listened to Leo talk about the banquet earlier that night, complaining about having to interact with some of the nobles. Niles knew there was more bothering him than he let on; he hadn't even mentioned the crowd from the morning. He must have been truly tired from the day because he rarely went to sleep when anyone asked him to. Niles could only hope that with time, things would improve for his lord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was long but im not really proud of it??? i promise there will be more actual interactions between leo and niles... well maybe. after all, i dont have any of this plotted out :'D


	5. Chapter 5

Leo knew he would have to talk to Corrin eventually. It was impossible to avoid her forever and his conversations with Ryoma could only drag so long before he had free time. He tried his best to interact with Takumi and Sakura, especially since the latter would be a guest at Nohr for a while. But Corrin had eventually asked that they talk over lunch while he had been busy addressing Niles and Odin's duties for that day. Odin reassured him that the conversation would go fine while Niles suggested he feign illness so he could bail. Honestly, he wasn't even sure why he suspected anything else from the two. 

So he sat across from his sister in the courtyard, their lunch remained untouched as they both waited awkwardly for the other to start.

"So... Camilla left." Corrin said, having been told by her siblings earlier when her question became persistent and they could no longer avoid it.

"Yes."

"How long ago?"

"A few weeks."

"And you didn't think to tell me something? Shoot me a letter?" Leo looked away.

"I had a lot to do. I didn't have time to think about it."

"Didn't have time to think about it? Leo, you always think about everything, I'm not buying that for a second. I want to know when my baby brother is being left all alone!"

"I'm not alone. I have my retainers."

Corrin gave a little huff, blowing her bangs out of her face. "Yeah, very reassuring." She rested her head on her hand.

"Something wrong with them? ...Did Niles say something to you a few nights ago?"

Corrin tilted her head. "No, nothing." Leo could tell she was lying. "I guess it's fine that you have them. Niles, at least, is very... protective of you."

"It's his job."

"Uh huh. Keep telling yourself that." She straightened her back before continuing, "Camilla shouldn't have left you."

"I understand why she did, even if you can't." Leo looked back at the castle. "Being in those halls was a constant reminder of everything for her. Father, Xander, Elise. She needed to breathe, and who was I to say no? I'd do anything for my family." He looked back to her as if he was waiting for the next move in a game of chess.

"So would I, Leo. Which is why I can't stand the thought of you being by yourself with such a heavy burden on your shoulders."

"We addressed this already. And with Sakura serving as a diplomat the burden won't be so intimidating." 

"But I don't feel comfortable with it all..." Corrin sighed, staring off into the distance. "Being king of Nohr hasn't been good for you."

"Being king of Nohr has never been good for anyone. What do you want me to do about?" His tone felt more hostile than he intended, but he didn't want to apologize for it.

"I just want what's best for you," she said, taken aback. Leo looked away. If she really wanted what was best for him, she wouldn't have put his family through hell. "Maybe I should stay with Sakura and make sure things are okay..."

"No!" He objected before awkwardly clearing his throat. "No, I'm alright Corrin. I don't need you watching over me."

"But-"

"You'll only get in the way." He let a weak smile appear on his face. "Politics has never been your strong suit."

"I wouldn't be staying here for politics, I'd be staying here for you." The sincerity in her voice made him turn back to look at her. She meant well. She always meant well. But he knew his sister was driven and devoted to light, and the castle would be no place for someone so radiant. Hearing the constant pessimism of Nohrian politics would bother her, no matter what reason she had for trying to stay. He didn't want to do that to her. And if she stayed he certainly wouldn't want to watch her leave again, which would be the inevitable.

"I don't want you to stay." He told her firmly. "I can handle this. Corrin, have a little faith in me." She sighed, sitting back in her chair.

"Fine, Leo. But please, don't be afraid to tell me anything. It doesn't matter how far apart we are. I'll always be your big sister."

He gave her a grateful smile, but the rest of the conversation was shortly interrupted by the arrival of a messenger. He was handed a letter (damn those letters) and with much chagrin opened it up.

"What's it about?" Corrin asked, nosy as ever.

"Another town that needs support. I'm going to assume that the influx of letters is a result of my father's refusal to help these places in the past. They must think I have some magic cure now that I'm here." He sighed.

"Influx? Well, thank the gods that you have Sakura helping you out now. She's good at knowing what to do when people are involved."

"I'll seek her advice on this then."  
*****

"I think that y-you should visit the village." Was the first words out of Sakura's mouth. Niles was with them, his arms crossed as he listened intently to their conversation. 

"Visit?"

"It'd be a show of goodwill... people will have faith in their king if he shows up to help them. B-but it's just a suggestion! You don't have to..." She glanced nervously between the king and his retainer. Leo looked to Niles who gave a shrug of indifference.

"That might be a suggestion that I follow, Princess Sakura. I'm glad to see you're already showing promising signs for Nohr and Hoshido's future." She smiled at him, an embarrassed blush rising to her cheeks.

"Just doing my job." She quickly excused herself afterwards, saying how she wanted to get a few more goodbyes to her siblings before they left later that afternoon.

"How far is this village, milord?" Niles asked once she was gone.

"Half a day's journey. You needn't worry, I'll have plenty of guards accompanying us."

"If you don't mind, Lord Leo, I'll deal with the guards. I think you might need to practice a speech for the people at the village."

"A speech?"

"It'll be your first public appearance that isn't a coronation or week long party. The villagers will want to hear something." Leo sighed. Maybe he'd just wing it when he got there. 

"I'll keep it mind. Thank you, Niles." He smiled at his retainer. "What would I do without you?"

"I'm sure you'd get by. It just wouldn't be as fun, milord." Leo rolled his eyes, but he had been genuine when he spoke. The ease of conversation that he shared with Niles had relieved stress and let him loosen up when there was no one else around. He didn't feel as calm around anyone other than Niles. It was probably because he was his retainer. He should feel safe around him no matter what. But it wasn't the same with Odin. Speaking of his other retainer...

"Niles, have you seen Odin around?" He asked out of the blue. 

"No, milord. I thought he was running an errand for you."

"Hmm... I hadn't been able to talk to either of you this morning. I assumed you both went about your normal tasks."

"I may have seen him earlier, but not since." Niles paused, glancing out the window of the study they had been occupying. "I think we can talk about Odin later, however. It seems that the Hoshidans are preparing to leave now."

"Oh." Leo said with little grace. It was time for him to say goodbye to his sister. He was sure that he was dragging his feet as he went to say his farewells. He finally spotted the Hoshidans standing at the exit. Sakura was hugging Ryoma and saying her goodbyes while Corrin chatted idly with Takumi. She spotted Leo and ran over to him, giving him a startling hug he hadn't expected. He swore he heard Niles laughing behind him. 

"I'm sorry that I could only stay the week." Corrin said, releasing him finally. 

"It's fine, sister." He wanted to remind her that this was more of a political meeting than a personal one, but that might have been rude. "You have many things to attend to in Hoshido, I'm sure."

"Of course, but..." She sighed. "You're right." She finally said, smiling at him. Ryoma approached them, daunting as ever, in order to say his own goodbyes to the king. By the end of it all, Leo, Niles and Sakura stood at the castle entrance, waving to the Hoshidan royals.

Leo noticed Sakura reach into her pocket once they were out of sight, pulling out a rather wrinkled letter. He was so done with reading letters.

"T-this is for you, King Leo. I was told to give it to you after my siblings left..." she gently handed him the letter.

"By who?" he asked, opening it up. 

"Y-your retainer, Odin." Leo exchanged a look of worry with Niles, feeling his retainer lean over his shoulder to read the letter. He felt a little uncomfortable with the closeness though he wasn't sure why. He drew his attention back to the letter, reading each word carefully. When the silence became too much Sakura eventually had to speak.

"Is everything alright?"

Leo inhaled sharply. "It... it appears that three of the castle's inhabitants have left, including Odin. It does not say where they went or when they will return. Only that they wish us the best of luck."

Sakura gave a tiny gasp. "Oh no! If I had given you the letter sooner, you could have stopped them..."

"You were only doing what was asked of you. This isn't your fault." Leo said.

Niles moved to place a reassuring hand on Leo's shoulder, but the blond quickly shrugged him away. "Milord..."

"If you'll both excuse me, I have many things to attend to. This letter changes nothing." He left before either of them could stop him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eeeyyy this was kind of short and i didnt really know what to write. just setting things up i guess. tbh the whole reason i started writing this thing was because i realized that leo would have very few people left with him by the end of birthright and that it made a very lovely setup for a fic. sadly, finals are coming up for me so there wont be anything for like two weeks >.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i totally dont listen to the saddest fe:fates soundtracks while writing this....

Niles wasn't sure what to do. It had been weeks since Odin, Laslow and Selena disappeared, leaving their vague letter and a whole lot of drama for him to deal with. The events in the castle had actually continued like normal, with Leo attending to the needs of Nohr with haste. However, there was a clear tension Niles felt in all of his conversations with the king, tension so palpable that even Sakura and her retainers had noticed it.

He wasn't sure what to do, and it was killing him. 

He was starting to wonder if he should ask someone else for advice. Normally, Odin would be the only other person he went to when he had troubles he couldn't address with Leo, but it seemed as if the mage would not be returning for a long time. Niles knew that he'd resent him for that action for much longer. He contemplated going to someone new, but he wasn't fond of the idea of laying out his dirty laundry for anyone.

Sakura might have tried to ask him about Leo's health once, after seeing the king look more drained than normal, but she was too shy around him. Too intimidated. Hana was a little more fearless but it turned out he had nothing to offer on the matter. What was he to tell them anyway when his own lord hadn't talked to him about anything personal for weeks? And gods forbid if Subaki and him were in the same room together.

The only thing that Niles could hope would raise Leo's spirits would be their venture to the village that Sakura said he should visit. Being able to help them might make him feel better about himself. All three of them had been busy trying to figure out the safest way to get there without endangering anyone. Only a few guards were chosen to accompany them, and they were supposed to be among the best, though Niles would be lying if he said he didn't want those guards to be Laslow, Selena and Odin. The three of them were exceptional in their arts.

"Hello, Niles." The voice drew him out of his thoughts and he stalled in his walk through the hall. He turned to see Sakura standing there, shoulders hunched in a way that made her seem smaller than she really was. She held her staff tightly till her knuckles turned white. She seemed like she was in a bit of a rush.

"Ah, hello Princess Sakura. Is something the matter?" he pointed to her staff.

She fidgeted for a moment. "Oh, um... King Leo fainted."

"He what?" Panic gripped Niles in that moment. Sakura seemed to notice because she shook her head and straightened up a little bit.

"N-no, it's nothing serious! We were talking about some things and well... I think he's just exhausted. I was actually going to return my staff to my room. He's already sleeping now, but you can probably go see him..." She looked out one of the many tall windows in the hall, watching the rain land against it with terrifying force. Just another storm of Nohr.

Niles forced himself to relax and shook his head. "Thank you, but I think I will let him rest."  
"Are you sure? I think he wouldn't mind to wake up and see you there..." Niles looked at her curiously. "I-I just mean, you should be the one to tell him to take more care of himself, not me. It means more when it comes from someone close. You two are close, right?"

"I have been Lord Leo's retainer for many years, before he even had Odin. I would certainly consider us close."

"That's good..." Sakura sighed, and Niles couldn't help but point out her odd behavior. "S-sorry! It's just that there are many times when King Leo speaks so highly of you. I'm glad it's mutual!"

"Do I appear that often in your conversations with him?"

"Y-yes, actually." The statement made Niles feel embarrassed for some reason. "You both really care about each other."

"Of course. I owe my lord everything, and would eagerly give anything to make sure he was safe. Words cannot begin to explain my debt to him."

"I'm sure he feels the same way. I know I owe my life to Subaki and Hana many times over."

Niles shrugged his shoulders. "It's simply the duty of us retainers, milady." 

"I know..." she sighed. "Do you think it's still a good idea to go to that village?" Niles spent a few moments pondering what she could mean by that when he realized that she was concerned about Leo. "I-I mean, King Leo hasn't looked well ever since I arrived. He hasn't been... taking care of himself well."

"My lord has been rather tired of late, yes, but taking this venture away from him would only make him feel less useful to his country. Lately, it seems all that's keeping him together is his duty to Nohr." Niles wondered why he was willing to discuss this so openly with Sakura and realized quickly that it was because she seemed to genuinely care about what happened here, from Leo to Nohr's very future. It was a quality that Corrin somehow lacked. Sakura was shy, yes, but she didn't seem to have the same naivety of her sister. She understood what was happening and wanted to help to her fullest.

"I understand. Then I hope speaking to those villagers lifts his spirits..." Sakura gave a small dip of her head before continuing her descent through the hall. 

Niles stood there for another minute, contemplating whether or not he should see his lord. Deciding that it was probably best, he made his way to the king's room. Inside, he found Leo was no longer asleep, but reading another one of his books.

"I heard what happened, milord. I thought you were resting."

"We both know what constitutes as my version of resting." Leo said, not looking up from the book.

"How are you feeling then?"

"Better, I suppose. I still have a lot of work left to do today, so I won't be in here much longer."

"Take as much time as you need, milord. It won't do much good to accomplish work if you're still not at your best." 

A small chuckle escaped Leo, though he didn't seem happy. "This feels like deja vu." Niles recalled the time that Leo had gotten sick. He had to agree with the statement, but he didn't like how easily Leo brushed off any forms of help from others. What was happening was serious, and he was going to make sure he knew that one way or another.

"This shouldn't have to happen more than once. It's in Nohr's best interest that you are alright and healthy."

"I'm fine now."

"I hate to be combative, milord, but you are not fine. Princess Sakura said you collapsed from exhaustion."

"I was up late last night, reviewing a few papers and planning my speech to the village." Leo closed his book and looked up at Niles, who had moved directly to the side of the bed. He placed the text down and sighed. "You think that Odin's leave has affected me too much, don't you?"

"You sleep even less than you did before, skip meals according to the chefs I asked, and you envelop yourself in work rather than communicate with anyone else in the castle."

"Tell me, Niles, who's left for me to talk to?" The words were bitter and sharp, making Niles take a step back. Leo didn't even look at him. "Who hasn't left me already?"

"I haven't, milord." He surprised himself when he took a step forward and placed his hand on top of Leo's. The gesture forced the king to look back at him with mild shock. "I have said many times that I won't ever leave your side. After all, I still have a debt to pay."

"So you'd stay for a debt?"

"I'd stay for you." Silence sat heavy in the room, only interrupted when Niles removed his hand and took a few steps back. "Please, get some rest, milord." He said a small goodbye before exiting the room, not once stealing a glance back.

Walking down the long halls of the castle gave him time to think about his own words and actions. Of course he would stay by Leo's side forever. He couldn't imagine the rest of his life any other way. But there seemed to be this feeling fluttering within him, something that might have always been there. He wasn't sure what, but that feeling grew the moment he touched Leo's hand. Maybe it made sense, what he was beginning to feel towards his lord. They had worked closely for so long... He shook his head and sighed. What ever was starting in him needed to stop. He wasn't going to jeopardize his position as a retainer or sully Leo's name with any sort of emotions he harbored. He knew his place.

Days later he found himself walking next to a caravan housing Leo and Sakura with Hana at his side and Subaki flying above on his grand pegasus. It would be half a day's walk to the village, or so he was told. There were a few guards on each side, keeping pace. It seemed quiet inside of the carriage, but both Sakura and Leo were soft talkers, so who knew if they were discussing the future events. Even his perfect hearing wouldn't be able to tell. 

Leo had been much quieter in his conversations with Niles following the day he had collapsed from exhaustion. Their talks were blunt and never personal in ways they used to be. He feared that he may have over stepped some sort of line with his lord but didn't voice the thoughts to anyone. Besides, he had heard one of the servants in the castle complaining about Leo's shortness and another one chalking it up to his tiredness. He could easily say that was what had made the tension between them grow even more, but something else nagged at him.

"Looks like we'll be there soon." Hana announced as she spotted the town in the distance. Subaki landed his pegasus next to them, letting it walk at their pace.

"I'll fly ahead and make sure everything is alright." He told Hana, not even sparing a glance to Niles. Good, the outlaw wasn't exactly fond of the pegasus rider to begin with. The white beast took wing once more, becoming smaller and smaller in the sky. An odd feeling began to creep up Niles' back as he watched Subaki disappear. Somehow, he felt as though things were about to go horribly awry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *jazz hands* let the gayness begin


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow i accidentally deleted the chapter and didn't realize until three days later. splendid.

"Do you know what you'll say to them?" Sakura's voice was so quiet that Leo almost didn't hear her over the sound of the carriage moving over rough terrain. She sat across from him in the carriage, picking nervously at her clothing.

"More or less. I've tried to write down a few speeches, but I'm afraid this will just have to be something that comes naturally to me." He rested his head on his hand and let his thoughts wander. Talking to these people was going to be a huge step forward for him and he hoped sorely that it turned out well. He wasn't very good with people. If Elise were here, she'd know exactly what to do...

"I-I think you'll do a great job!" Sakura encouraged. Leo spared her a smile before stifling a yawn. He had been restless last night, as always. The added stress of this day didn't help either. So many times he wished he could run away from his duties just like Camilla had. Each night he pondered how he would escape the confines of the castle, memorizing the schedules of each guard that walked the halls and waiting for his golden opportunity. Of course, no matter how far he got, he would have to head for Niles' room first. He had no doubt his retainer would accompany him if he asked, and if he didn't he knew that the outlaw would hunt him down and join him anyway. Having Niles there was a must.

"Do you suppose we're almost there?" Sakura asked. 

"We should be." Leo narrowed his eyes in thought. It felt as though the carriage was slowing down, which was probably why Sakura had asked the question. But he didn't think they were that close yet...

There was murmuring outside, mostly from Niles and Hana as far as he could tell. Something was wrong, that's all he knew. He reached for Brynhildr which sat by his side, tucked carefully under his cape. He shared a worried glance with Sakura before opening the door to the carriage and exiting. He stood among the guards, noting the expression of worry on their face. Sakura trailed after him. 

"Is everything alright, Niles?" He addressed his retainer who was showing a rare look of discomfort. Hana stepped forth to answer.

"No, King Leo. We sent Subaki to scout ahead about half an hour ago, but he hasn't returned and we're getting closer to the village. We fear that something might be there." Sakura gave a small gasp.

"It's very odd for there to be any dangerous activity in this town, milord." Niles said. "I've been here before, and it is normally quiet and docile."

"We need to find Subaki." Sakura announced. 

"It's dangerous, Lady Sakura!" said Hana. "Niles and I can go first-"

"It's safer if we all go. Subaki could be injured, and he went alone. You'll need me to heal his wounds." Hana sighed, and Leo knew then that she was used to this flare of determination that Sakura held deep within her. It was admirable on both parts.

"Then let's go." Leo said, clutching his tome. Little protest was shown after that as they chose to abandon the carriage and make the rest of the trek on foot. The town wasn't far, but when they did arrive Leo was surprised to see the people all staying to the sides of the streets, their gaze anticipatory at best and predatory at worst. Leo wasn't sure what to make of all the attention but he knew the tension rising in the air wasn't normal. These people were waiting for something, and it was more than just his arrival.

He felt Niles inch closer to him so that their arms practically touched, ready to draw his bow at any time. Sakura stepped forward, ready to say something, when suddenly at least a dozen brigands were on them, leaping out of the shadows of homes and pushing past crowds of people. The villagers scattered, not even hesitating to let the attackers through.

It had been months since Leo engaged in combat, but over that time he had refused to let himself become rusty in his craft. He heard Niles launch an arrow next to him, pegging one of the first arrivals. Leo tried to contain his shock when he saw the person had been a Hoshidan. Sparing a quick glance to the field he found that the ruffians were a mix of Nohrians and Hoshidans, raising more questions than ever. But he didn't have time to come up with questions as another one headed for him. He let the feeling of Brynhildr envelop him and cast the spell from the tip of his fingers, magic buzzing through the air.

He could hear Hana clanging swords with a mercenary, letting out a rally cry. The other guards that had come with them seemed less up to the task than he had hoped, for one of them was already lying on the ground lifeless. Clearly, their enemy was more skilled than he thought. He defended himself from another attack with his magic, focusing on the battle as much as he could without questions and worry stealing his attention. He barely dodged a sword that grazed his cheek, but retaliation was taken away when Niles lodged an arrow in the man's back. The ruffian's numbers were dwindling, and that's what mattered most of all.

A sharp pain found itself in his hand, forcing him to drop Brynhildr in shock. Someone with amazing aim had hit his hand with an arrow. He watched Hana leap after the archer, running him through with her katana. In his moment of distraction he hadn't noticed another person running towards him. He was vulnerable to their rising sword as they gained on him. His sorry attempt at evasion only made him trip over his own tome, letting the man tower over and thrust the weapon down. He closed his eyes in anticipation.

He didn't feel any pain, but rather something warm covered his face. He opened his eyes to see that the lethal blow had been blocked by Niles' own body. Blood splattered him as the enemy withdrew their sword, ready to finish the job in one swift motion as Leo's retainer fell back onto him. Suddenly, an arrow came flying past Leo and found itself in the man's neck. He almost though that it had been Niles once more, and with aim like that he could have sworn it was if the man didn't lay bloody before him. He turned to see Sakura holding the bow Niles had dropped, fire in her eyes. He had almost forgotten that she had been taught how to hold a bow just like her brother Takumi and their mother Mikoto. 

The fighting dragged to a halt around them as the brigand's forces depleted far too quickly. He heard Hana chase after one of them, but he didn't care. He was watching Niles' bleed out before him, his eye already closing. He tried to say something, anything, but his mouth was dry and the words wouldn't come out. Niles was going to die. He was going to die and leave him even though he promised he wouldn't and Leo was helpless to do anything all over again, always helpless-

"King Leo, step back! I need to heal his wounds!"

-He was such an idiot for thinking that anyone would stay by his side, and he should have known that a promise didn't mean that reality couldn't take away the people he loved most, like Xander and Elise and-

"King Leo, please! Move back so I can help him!" Sakura's voice finally caught his attention, drawing him back to the reality of the situation. He was hesitant to move at all because Niles was partially resting on him and his breath was so shallow that he feared any movement would make it go away. He found it in himself to move despite this, and he let Niles' head rest gently on the ground. He watched Sakura pull out her staff that had been strapped to her side, leaning over Niles as she tried to heal his wounds. His eyes had already closed, slipping into unconsciousness. "It's so deep..." she muttered.

Leo was vaguely aware that he had regained Brynhildr and was clutching it too tightly, but he didn't dare drop the tome. It felt like hours before Hana returned, muttering something the minute she saw Niles. Sakura placed her staff to the side, staring at Niles with great sadness on her face.

"Is he...?"

"He's going to be fine, King Leo. As long as we get him back to Castle Krakenburg, he'll be fine."

"What if he-"

"I-I promise. But we need to leave now." She rose to her feet and scanned the area. "Hana, did you find Subaki?"

"That's what I came to tell you, Lady Sakura. He's slightly injured, but he should-" She was interrupted by the appearance of Subaki himself, arriving on his pegasus. Both of them were injured but seemed sturdy enough for a trip back. "I found him tied up behind one of the houses." 

Subaki dismounted and apologized for screwing up so royally. "When I arrived at the town, everyone was acting very suspicious. I didn't dare land my pegasus, but an arrow was shot from the crowd and, well, my dear mount freaked out and flew to the ground. I'm afraid even my perfect skills couldn't get me out of the scrap once they knocked my lance away. I apologize, Lady Sakura. This won't ever happen again."

"It's okay, Subaki. Can you and your pegasus carry Niles back to the carriage?" 

"Of course, milady." He walked over to Niles and gestured for Hana to help him get the outlaw on the pegasus. Once carefully seated, Subaki followed the remaining guards and royals back to the carriage. Leo wasn't sure if he was supposed to say something or acknowledge the people around him. He was so afraid to speak, and he didn't even know why. Watching how limp Niles was sent a familiar pain through his heart. With all the people he lost he thought that he would have gotten used to the ache and fear, to the vacancy they left. But maybe it was one of those emotions he'd never learn to cope with.

Sakura didn't say a word as she helped Niles into the carriage so she could keep an eye on him on their way back to the capital. Leo sat there, watching as she would occasionally pull out her staff to further the healing process. How did everything fall apart so quickly? His worst case scenario hadn't put Niles on the near-death list at all, and yet here he was, watching helplessly as the last person he trusted struggled for life.

"I am so sorry," Sakura said when the carriage was a bit away from the castle. "It had been my idea t-to visit the village and I-I-I should have..."

"Don't apologize." Leo's voice was softer than he anticipated. "You couldn't have predicted any of this. You're helping now, so you don't need to worry." He hated to admit that he felt a lump form in his throat as he spoke and that his eyes stung as he held back tears. Sakura seemed to be doing a worse job of holding back the waterworks, but it didn't stop her from concentrating on Niles' condition. 

"I feel as though I have been nothing but trouble since I got here..." When Leo didn't say anything, she decided to not continue a conversation. He was thankful for that, because while he disagreed with what she had said greatly, he feared he might just breakdown in front of her if he tried to talk more. He decided to try and not look at the two for the rest of the ride. Seeing Niles all mangled hurt him so much, but so did seeing a kind girl talented with healing and gifted with a great heart. Had things been different, it could have been Elise here.

There were so many things it could have been.

He refused to leave Niles' side at the castle, despite Sakura and the other healers telling him that he wasn't helping by sitting there and watching. Eventually, once they knew he was stable, they left the king and his retainer. Leo situated himself on a chair by Niles' bed, staring at his retainer - friend - with regret and pain. The only light in the room was the occasional flash of lightning and dim glow from the dying daylight behind thick grey clouds. He watched Niles' chest rise and fall, feeling guilt crash over him like waves on a shore. If he hadn't been so disoriented during the fight from his exhaustion he could have easily recovered and saved himself. 

"I know it's your job to protect me." Leo found himself talking despite knowing that Niles was asleep and wouldn't hear a word he said. "You're my retainer. Have been for years. But I... I don't want you to be my retainer if this is what happens. How could you toss yourself so recklessly between me and that blade? Don't you see how stupid that was?" his voice was rising and part of him was afraid someone would walk in and ask him what he was doing. "You could have died, Niles! You almost did. How do you expect me... how do you expect me to do this with out you?

"Everyone's gone now." His voice fell to a tired whisper. "Odin, Xander, Elise, Camilla... Father. You said you wouldn't leave me, but they didn't have a choice. Why did I believe you did? This world is cruel and crushes any promises we make with little effort." He exhaled a shaky breath and looked at Niles' hand. Hesitantly, he placed his on top of it, feeling the warmth and reminding himself that he was still alive and breathing. He lowered his head, letting tears fall onto the bed. "I'm so sorry, Niles. You're all I have right now... and I don't know what I would do if you died. I-I can't handle any of this as it is. I don't want to be king of Nohr. I didn't ask to have this crown or for Camilla to pass it on to me. I want to run away, just like she did, but I can't. I want to flee as far as I can from this dark country just like Corrin did, but I can't. Some days I... some days I want to be with Xander and Elise, but I can't.

"I can't do anything but sit here and disappoint people, force them to leave me. I was told that the people who attacked us were Nohrians and Hoshidans who banded together in a hope to capture or kill us for a large sum of money. So can I only unite these kingdoms under their hatred for me? Their want for money, power, justice, and I can't satisfy any of it. I want to be a leader like Xander, but even in death he casts a shadow too big for me to get out of. I wish I could be just as confident as Camilla instead of... having to fake it all the time. If I had an ounce of Elise's kindness...

"If I had what made Corrin so beloved by her siblings. To be just and fair like King Ryoma, or patient like Princess Sakura. To have my family just like Prince Takumi does... Is it all too much to ask for? How does anyone expect me to be as great as them? At the rate I'm going, it would be easy to say even my father was a better king." Leo gave an empty chuckle. He held Niles' hand with both of his now, bringing his forehead to it as he continued to weep. He was vaguely aware that he was still apologizing over and over again, nothing but 'sorry' trailing off of his tongue, the words drowned out by booms of thunder. At some point he found himself drifting off to a nightmare fueled sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it feels like i spent three years editing this chapter

Niles woke feeling like someone had dumped him out of a window from the top of the castle. His head ached, his stomach was sore and there was a tingling sensation left on his skin that told him someone had been using their staff to heal him - a lot. Overall, not the worse condition he had woken up in before, but there was still room to complain. For once, clouds did not hang dismally over Nohr and dawn light poured through the tall windows. He flexed his fingers and was surprised to feel one hand was enveloped by someone else. He stiffly turned his head to see Leo there, sitting on a chair with his hands holding Niles' and his head resting awkwardly on the side of the bed.

If he wasn't so concerned as to why Leo was there, he would almost say the scene was downright adorable. The way his blond bangs rested gently against his pale face was practically perfect, especially in the rare light of morning. The dark bags under his eyes were unsettling, and Niles was quickly reminded that his lord rarely wore such a peaceful look for many reasons. With his free hand he gently reached out and brushed Leo's bangs out of his face, his fingers skimming his forehead. He was sure that he was blushing when he did so as well as mentally chiding himself for such a fond gesture, but it didn't stop him. He knew he should reign in his emotions, but what Leo didn't know wouldn't kill him.

While he did this action he tried to piece together his memories to come to a conclusion on what the hell happened to him. He remembered the ambush at the village and Leo's hand being hit by an arrow... right, he had blocked Leo from being stabbed by that one guy. He expected the wound to be bad, but not this bad. He supposed all that mattered was that Leo was okay. He looked at the cut on the king's thin hand. Well, mostly okay. He moved his own hand so that he could examine the injury better, but the movement seemed to rouse the blond.

His eyes slowly opened, blinking away sleep and confusion as he sat up. At first he didn't seem to notice Niles. He wasn't a very observant person in the mornings, he knew that much. But then he finally got a grasp on what was happening and his eyes widened as he locked gazes with Niles.

"Good morning, milord."

"Niles! How are you feeling? Does anything hurt?" His voice was panicked and he leapt to his feet, the chair beneath him making a scratchy noise as it moved back.

"I feel fine. Maybe a little sore, but that's to be expected after such a rough night." Leo sighed and let his shoulders relax. Still, his eyes kept darting up and down Niles like he was expecting to find a new life threatening injury. He paused, his amber gaze drawing to their hands which were still wrapped around each other. Niles was surprised to see his lord blushing, color rising to his cheeks and ears faster than ever. 

"S-sorry I was-"

"It's fine, I was just looking at the cut on your hand. That could get infected if you're not careful."

"I have less to worry about than you do." Leo said. Niles looked around the room and spotted a roll of fresh bandages on the nightstand. He sat up as carefully as he could and reached for it, keeping Leo's hand in his.

"Those bandages are for you, Niles."

"I can spare a bit." He gently wrapped his pale hand with it, being careful not to pull it too tight. "See? No big deal."

"You shouldn't be the one tending after my wounds right now. I should get Sakura and tell her you're awake."

"No need to rush, milord." Niles let go of his hand, albeit a little sadly. "How have you been doing? I can imagine there is a bit of unrest after what happened." What he was truthfully talking about was Leo's unrest, but he wasn't sure if his lord would admit to anything. 

"It's nothing I can't handle. You shouldn't worry about that though, just worry about getting better. Now, I need to get Sakura." Leo rushed out of the room before anything else could be said. Some days he really did have a one track mind. The king's unrest and worry began to rub off on Niles as he wondered what was going through his mind. It couldn't be healthy, that was for sure. He was looking worse than ever and Niles could practically cut the tension in the room with a knife. Leo clearly was trying to hide something that he wanted to say. 

Minutes later, Leo returned with the princess, both of them wearing a face of exhaustion. She discovered that Niles would be healing well, though it was best that he naturally healed the rest of the way instead of using her staff.

"I do recommend that you stay in bed, though." she said. "You'll need lots of rest to recover, and you'll probably feel really tired if you try to get up too quickly. Your bandages should be changed every six hours or so." She paused, seeming to fall deep in thought. Her gaze wandered to Leo. "King Leo, I hate to ask you this, but it might be best if you kept watch on him for the next few weeks. I know that you're very busy-"

"I'll do it. I can just work in here."

"Th-that's good!" Sakura smiled and Niles understood that she was actually just trying to get him to stay in one place so he could rest, too. It was a smart move, he'd give her that. Leo seemed far more eager to drop everything when someone else was in trouble, but not himself. Just another admirable quality, he supposed. The moment became awkward as Niles realized Leo was just standing there and staring at him while Sakura had been expecting a continued conversation. She gave Niles an odd look that he couldn't decipher before saying, "I'll come back in a few hours to replace the bandages." She dipped her head politely before exiting the room, shutting the door behind her. 

Niles decided to break the silence that ensued her departure. "No need to drop everything for me, milord."

"It's the least I can do." His voice was hushed as he took a seat by the bed once more. "I want to make sure you make a full recovery. Besides, I have a feeling you'll get bored by yourself and harass what servants come to help you. I really don't feel like dealing with more complaints as it is." He joked, but there was no real happiness on his face. Niles chuckled despite this. 

"I never did thank you for saving my life." Leo said after a few minutes of silence.

"Just doing my job."

"I know, but I shouldn't have been that vulnerable in the first place. Clearly, I've let my skills fall to disarray after the war with Hoshido. I'll have to train more now."

"If I'm going to be honest, I think your skills were just fine. It was your fatigue that left you open. You should be resting just as much as I am." Leo sighed and muttered something under his breath. He didn't seem satisfied with the response. A sullen look crossed his face when he made eye contact with him.

"I almost lost you, Niles." He let his head hang so that his hair hid his face. "Just like I lost Xander and Elise."

"I'm here now, which is what counts." He tried to reassure.

"But don't you see? You... promised that you wouldn't leave me, and I believed you. But if that sword had been just a bit father to the right, a little deeper, you could have... died." He let out a mirthless chuckle. "When we fought against Corrin and her Hoshidan siblings, side by side, I didn't have this fear. I obviously never wanted you or Odin to fall in battle, but some part of me had accepted that either of you might carry out your duties as my retainer and lay down your life. Now I don't even know what I'd do if I lost you. I feel as though I couldn't carry on without you here." He brought a hand up to his face to hide his expression further. 

"No amount of promises is going to fix this fear. Even if you tell me everyday that you won't leave, I know this feeling will stay." He said. "So that's why I'm going to give you an order."

"Lord Leo?"

"I want you to value your life the way you value mine. Maybe then you won't be so quick to toss it away."

Niles sighed. "That'll be a difficult thing to do. My life is nothing compared to yours. But if it's an order from you, I'll try my best." He paused. "And I don't mind telling you everyday."

Leo looked up at him. "Don't mind telling me what?"

"That I'm going to stay by your side no matter what. Even if it doesn't make that feeling go away, maybe it will help a little bit."

Leo leaned back in his chair and gave a genuine smile. Niles was pretty damn sure that he wanted to kiss him in that moment. "You're much kinder than you let on, Niles."

"Y-yeah..." He stuttered, which elicited a rare and gleeful laugh from Leo.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but you look like you're blushing." the king teased, and it was so much nicer to see a smile on his face than the usual worried frown. Leo sighed and crossed his arms. "Thank you, though."

"Any time, my king."

*****

"Is King Leo not with you today?" Sakura asked as she changed Niles' bandages. It had been a day since he woke up and he was already beginning to feel better. The miracles of magic, he supposed.

"I believe he had other matters to attend to. It seems he's been relentlessly hunting down the Nohrians and Hoshidans who attacked us, but if his depressed demeanor is anything to go by, I'd say he isn't having much luck."

Sakura stared at Niles for a moment. "I-I'll be honest, I didn't notice anything was off with him. I mean, I usually don't notice much about people - I guess I'm not good at that kind of stuff." She paused. "... You two really are close." 

"We've worked side by side for years, so I can easily tell when there are behavioral changes in Lord Leo."

"T-that's actually very sweet." Sweet? Well, that was probably the first time that word had ever been directed at him. "Sometimes I wonder if-" She cut herself off with a shake of her head like she was dismissing what she was going to say.

"Wonder what, Princess Sakura?"

"I guess, um, the true extent of your f-feelings for King Leo. Like, well... do you see him as more than a friend?" She paused in wrapping the bandage and looked away. Niles wondered if he had done something to make his feelings obvious - he was normally very good at hiding things about himself. Maybe Sakura was more intuitive than she gave herself credit for. A momentary silence settled over them and the princess began to apologize for asking such a personal question. If one person was going to know about the truth, he supposed Sakura wasn't the worst option out there. 

"I think you're much more observant than you give yourself credit for, Lady Sakura. I would be lying if I said my feelings didn't extend past normal platonic ones."

"Oh my gosh, I knew it!" Sakura exclaimed with more excitement than he thought was physically possible. She put her hands over her mouth seconds later, surprised by her outburst just as much as Niles was. "I-I-I mean... it's just that you two... uh, well, you always look at him the way Corrin and Silas look at each other and it's just that..." The princess sighed.

"Was it really that obvious?"

"I think it was just obvious to me... Subaki and Hana had no idea what I was talking about!"

Niles raised an eyebrow at her. "You talk about me and Lord Leo to your retainers?"

"Oh! Umm, sometimes? Sorry... I..." She couldn't seem to find the words to a proper apology and looked up at Niles with distress. She sure was adorable when she was caught off guard like this.

"Well, nice to know I take up so much of your attention." He paused and raised an eyebrow when he realized a much more interesting topic had made an appearance moments before. "So, Corrin and Silas, eh?"

*****

Leo wasn't sure what he expected to find when he followed Niles in the middle of the night. It certainly wasn't this. He had been trying to get some rest for once in his life (it had been a week since Niles' injury and he still was troubled by the entire event) when he heard footsteps outside his room, and he knew it wasn't any of the guards. He had their schedules etched in his brain, and whoever was walking outside certainly wasn't circling back to keep on their duty. When Leo got up and looked down the hallway to see who it was he was surprised to see a familiar mop of white hair heading farther and farther away.

Curious, he tailed Niles through the halls of the castle, careful to not make his presence known. He had a creeping suspicion that he already knew he was there, however, because Niles had always been good at that. He was exhausted and nearly lost sight of his retainer while crossing the large halls, but he eventually found him sitting outside in the courtyard on a bench, staring up at the sky. It was a rare night where few clouds passed by the visible full moon and stars shined brightly on the roses that grew nearby. Roses grew in Nohr the way cherry blossoms grew in Hoshido, though Leo wished a more beneficial plant grew in his country than some prickly flower.

"Niles? It's rather late out." Leo said, announcing his presence. He stood next to the man, staring down at him. 

"Hello, Lord Leo. Did my venture outside disturb your sleep? I apologize if I did."

"Well, I wasn't really sleeping anyway. Are you out here because you can't sleep?"

"Yes, I'm afraid." Leo frowned and took a seat next to him on the bench. "But it's alright. I've always loved looking at the stars anyway, so I'm rather comfortable right now." He breathed a sigh of content, his gaze never leaving the moon. Despite the pretty scene above, Leo's eyes never left Niles.

"...Is there a particular reason as to why you couldn't sleep tonight? Or are you like this every night?"

Niles chuckled but tiredness laced his voice. "It's not an uncommon situation for me, but not every night. It might sound silly, but I had a nightmare. I suppose seeing the stars helps me calm down a bit."

"Oh." Leo glanced up at the sky, seeing each star sparkle miraculously against the dark. "Is your nightmare something you want to talk about?" He pried. He only wanted to be helpful, but he was wondering if he was pushing a little too much.

"Only if you're willing to hear. It isn't exactly a pleasant conversation."

"You've helped me when I feel down plenty of times. I'll listen to anything you have to say."

Niles tore his gaze away from the stars and looked at Leo, completely silent for a minute. The moment became a little awkward before Niles looked away. "Well, it was a bit from my past. Some not so great memories of the people I used to be with. There was always so much strife and grief in the slums, such horrible things that I can never forget. But being here now helps, so you really mustn't worry."

Leo frowned. He wished that his retainer hadn't been through such awful things, but he knew he could do nothing to right the past. He desperately wished he could, but he was stuck in the present and constantly worrying about the future. Somewhere out there, he knew that there were people living horrible lives, believing they had been forgotten by Nohr's government. That image made an odd feeling grow in his chest and new ideas spring to mind. 

"As king, I promise you that I'll do what I can to fix this kingdom. Your suffering should have never happened and I want to ensure no child goes through such things again."

"It'd be impossible to eradicate all the bad things in Nohr." Niles reminded him.

"I'm aware. But... I want to do better than my father. In his final years he turned so cold and cruel and didn't care for his people. I want to be better than that." 

"If I may offer my opinion, milord, but I think you're already leagues better than King Garon. A lot of people have faith in you, both Nohrians and Hoshidans."

Leo sighed. "I know, and I hope that I never disappoint those people more than I already have." He watched a cluster of thin clouds move over the moon, dimming its light. "I still need to see more of Nohr to understand what needs to be done, however. So much of what I've seen through my life was clouded because of the missions I had to do under my father's reign, and that was before Nohr entered an official war with Hoshido. Not being able to talk with that village was a lost opportunity and it has certainly left most of the country rattled. Which is why I was thinking of just... sneaking out. No caravan, no guards, for just a day. I would hide my appearance of course, and I wouldn't be gone long enough for anyone to take real concern. I'm sure most people in the castle would believe I was studying in the library."

Niles looked at him with an unreadable expression. "If you think it best, then I agree. As long as you allow me to accompany you."

Leo opened his mouth to speak but hesitated. It felt too soon. He could still see Niles covered in blood and unconscious in his arms - the very image was an open wound of its own. But he knew that he wouldn't really be able to stop his retainer from coming. He let the worry fall from his face and smiled. "Of course, Niles. I imagine I wouldn't be able to shake you no matter what. But, there will be no departure until you're fully healed. I don't need you injuring yourself further." 

"It's been some time; I think I'm fine." Niles stared at him for a moment and Leo did his best to pull a stubborn expression. "But, if you insist. I'll wait until you agree that I'm okay."

"I'm only saying this because I care."

Niles gave a heavy sigh. "You sure are making this difficult..." Leo heard him say under his breath. He clearly didn't intend for the other to hear.

"What? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, nothing."

Leo huffed in annoyance. "I mean every word I say, Niles. I do care; greatly. I'd rather not relive the events of a week ago." His heart still ached at the thought that he could have lost someone he held so dear to his heart.

"I'll do my best to never put you through it again." Niles said. "After all, you gave me a hefty order."

"And I expect you to follow it no matter what." Leo rubbed his eyes and sighed. "It's rather late, so I think I'm going to try and sleep for the night. Are you going to stay out here?"

"Just a bit longer. Don't worry about me, milord." Leo frowned and nodded before making his way back inside the castle. 

Above all else, he'd always worry about Niles. This was his last friend; the last person to stay by his side. So he had to protect him and make sure nothing ever went wrong again. Maybe it was a bit aggressive of a thought process and he knew Niles wouldn't appreciate him constantly doting on his condition. When did all these emotions get so complicated? He had to sort himself out before he became some overly protective nuisance to his retainer. He contemplated it all as he lay back in his chambers, yet he couldn't catch a wink of sleep because his mind could only concentrate on Niles.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will probably be the most lighthearted chapter youll get from me for a while in this fic

“You know, waking up earlier than needed should be a crime in Nohr,” Leo said offhandedly. 

“Need I remind you this was your idea, my lord,” said Niles.

Leo sighed. “I know, I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t complain.” He dragged his hand along the wall of the tunnel they were in absently. 

It had been weeks since their injuries occurred and it was time to put their trip into Nohr in action. Since the country was naturally cold and dreary on the surface, many markets and homes were stowed underground, away from the unforgiving elements above. The tunnel they were in came directly out of the castle, leading into a populated town. The tunnel had been previously boarded up and no one knew about it, save for the royal members. It used to be Elise’s little escape route to the less stiff outer world.

Now it was Leo and Niles’ escape route, a chance for the king to experience his people’s lives first hand in far too long. He and his retainer were disguised to avoid any problems, though Brynhildr was attached to Leo by a belt, obscured by the ragged cloak he wore. Niles probably had stashed his bow or a knife as well, though he hadn’t seen anything himself.

“I wonder if I should have told Sakura before we left. She would have understood,” Leo mused.

“It’ll be fine. If anything happens back at the castle she’ll have it under control. Don’t forget, you should focus on what you see in front of you and what people say more than what happens back at the castle today. It’d be a wasted experience if you kept fretting about the same old things.”

“I’ll be sure to remain conscientious.” Leo looked Niles up and down. There wasn’t any limping or thrown off gate from favoring the side the sword had struck him, but he still worried. He had already asked that morning if Niles was really up to the venture today, and once more before entering the tunnel after they had avoided being spotted by the Hoshidan retainers who were already out and about. He would just end up annoying him if he asked again.

“How’s the hand?” Niles asked, glancing over in the dim torchlight that he held.

“As well as it was yesterday.” Leo stared down at the injury. It didn’t need wrapping anymore, but it was going to leave a considerate scar. One more to add to his collection.   
Niles’ gaze rose to the ceiling which stood as a black abyss above them. “Such a shame I couldn’t have been the one to take out the person who hurt you.”

“Hana handled it. She’s a very capable samurai.” Leo understood what Niles was feeling, however. Though he would always be grateful that Sakura saved them, a darker part of him wished he had been the one to exact revenge on the brigand who dared to try and take another person from him.

Their walk eventually led them to a covered door that they pushed past and led to busy streets filled with artificial lighting. The people walking the streets didn’t notice their presence, going about their daily activities with little care. Buildings and market stands were packed closely together, all huddled under the darkness of the underground. The lights that hung on roof edges and lined the cobblestone streets were brighter than their surface counterparts, giving an orange glow to the area. Maybe it wasn’t the bright fields and cherry blossoms of Hoshido, but there was something undeniably special and lively about the scene to Leo.

Niles brushed up against his side like a cat, sending chills down his spine. “Keep close, milord. I wouldn’t want to lose you amongst the crowd. And don’t forget to keep an eye on your coin pouch. Pickpockets start young out here.”

Leo nodded and looked away. “You’re, uh, probably right. I will do… that.” Lately he felt so aware of Niles’ presence, especially when he was close to him like this. Maybe it was left over reactions from his days fighting Hoshidan soldiers. The heightened effects of a war still weary on his mind.

They walked side by side, looking at the bright stands and the objects that adorned them. People waved their hands and welcomed in customers, putting on bright smiles despite their tired expressions. At least Nohrian economy was looking up, but it’d never be fast enough for these merchants. 

He paused in front of a stall with delicate knitted scarves. “They’re such bright colors,” said Leo. It was nothing like the drab attire most Nohrians wore.

“Well,” said the merchant running the stall, “It’s been easier to get brighter dyes from Hoshido since trade has been more gratuitous. They have all sorts of berries and flowers blooming there, the likes of which Nohr hasn’t seen in decades! It really just makes fabrics pop, you know?”

Leo gave a fond smile. Elise would have loved the bright pink one, its edges embroidered with pale blue butterflies. He could just see her wrapped up in it during cold nights. And the purple one next to it would match Camilla and her odd hair so well. She’d make any of these scarves look elegant and glamorous. And, well, if the girls got scarves they would absolutely impose one upon Xander. Most likely the warm red, regal and refined. He would have tried to turn it away but ultimately be proud by something his family gave him. Leo bit his bottom lip, hoping the pain would push away his thoughts.

“Are you going to purchase one?” Niles asked.

Leo nodded. “This one,” he said, pointing with one hand and pulling out his coin pouch with the other. The merchant handed it to him and took the coin, giving a polite thank you.  
Niles’ eyebrow raised. “Wasn’t expecting that one. Seems a little out of your style, if you don’t mind me saying.”

Leo looked down at it. It was bright blue, stitched just as tightly as the others, but it had an added bonus of having multicolored cat faces stuck to it. They were cute, if a bit simple. “Actually, I think the scarf is more your style. Here.” He leaned forward and wrapped the scarf around Niles’ neck, noticing the way the man stiffened under his contact. Maybe he shouldn’t have done that.

Niles’ smile allowed him to relax and avoid over thinking the interaction. “I have always been more of a cat person. I-” He suddenly cut himself off, his gaze focused on something in the distance. 

Leo turned to look, spying a pastel colored stand with a noticeably Hoshidan girl standing next to it. She stood out like a sore thumb among the crowd, a crowd that was mostly ignoring her stall. “We should go check it out,” he said.

Upon further inspection they found it was a food stand, sweet and warm smells brewing from it. Leo couldn’t recognize any of the foods, though they were just as pale and pastel as the stand itself.

“Hello there!” said the girl. “Are you interested in trying some dango? Or perhaps some daifuku? I even have mochi!”

The flurry of foreign words did nothing to help Leo’s confusion. “Uh, these are all Hoshidan treats, yes?”

“Oh, yes, they are! I should have said that first, shouldn’t I? I opened this stall less than a month ago here, hoping to help Nohrians get a ‘taste’ of Hoshidan culture! It’s been a slow start, but I always say that you should never be intimidated by trying new foods!”

Niles glanced back and forth. “Slow start is one word for it. You sure your enthusiasm isn’t scaring them away?”

Her smile twitched a bit. “Well, that could be it. It’s also… just hard. I wanna bet it’s because I’m new and all and don’t know Nohrian market that well, but… Oh, nevermind.”  
“No, no, do tell,” prompted Niles.

She sighed and wrung her hands together. “Some Nohrians haven’t been so kind about my presence. Not everyone wants unity. Even just selling some sweet treats from home is offensive.”

Leo looked away. “I’m… so sorry.”

“It’s not all bad! I get more customers everyday! I think that King Leo’s radical ideas are finally being accepted, just a little. Nohrians have problems in Hoshido all the time, but King Ryoma’s kindness and steady stance on diplomacy helps. I know things will get easier soon!” She grinned at them. “So, are you going to purchase anything? I really recommend the mochi!”

The conversation was interrupted by two young girls coming forth, curiously peering at the stand. They couldn’t be any older than twelve or thirteen. The younger one had two long braids going down her back while her older friend had long curled hair. They looked as scrappy as any child growing up in the underground, though their smiles were brighter than the street lamps.

“Hello there!” said the merchant. “Can I interest you in some dango?”

The girl with braids wrinkled her nose. “Dango? This some Hoshidan stuff?” She backed up. 

“It looks so pretty,” said the other girl. “We rarely see stuff like this in Nohr, Nina. We should try some!”

“I prefer to stick to the things we know. No offense, lady.” She smiled at the merchant and grabbed her friend’s arm. “But we’re gonna grab some food elsewhere.” She paused a look at Niles. “Nice scarf.”

“Thanks.”

They stared each other down for a second before she pulled her friend along, brushing past Leo. The crudeness of children never ceased to be amazing to him, and it coaxed a small smile out of him. At the same time, their drab and starved appearance was unsettling. These were the children Nohr housed? This country needed more work than he suspected, and he already knew it had been bad. 

“Still one of my more polite customers,” the merchant said. “Sorry about that, what were you going to purchase?”

“I think I’ll try the mochi, since you recommend it so fervently.” He reached for his coin pouch and found nothing there. For a moment he shuffled around his cloak awkwardly, checking all the places where it should have been. “Those girls must have… I’m sorry, I’ll be right back, I promise,” he said to the merchant. He scanned the sea of people and spotted them not far. “Hey!” He called out. The girl with braids caught his eye and bolted, her companion not far behind.

“And after I had warned you and everything, Leo,” Niles teased. “We’d best chase after them.”

“I was in the mood for a morning jog anyway,” Leo lied, already breaking out into a run after the girls with Niles right behind him. It was hard to maneuver through the crowd, all of them too busy with their own lives to move out of the way. “All she did was brush past me!”

“That’s all it takes. Those two have probably been at this for as long as they’ve been walking.”

The girls turned a sharp left into another street but the crowd seemed to thicken around them. They were going to lose them at this rate. This hadn’t been what Leo was expecting when they agreed to sneak out into town, but some part of him was thrilled as he turned the corner and pursued them. This was almost fun. Freeing. The king of Nohr was racing after scrappy orphans and no one had a single clue. 

They found themselves in a secluded street between a few buildings. It stretched farther ahead, but the girl with braids was on the ground, seemingly having tripped on one of the barrels nearby. Leo’s wallet sat at her feet, though her friend was pulling her away when she spotted Leo and Niles rounding the corner.  
“Nina, just leave it!” she said.

“Fine, fine!” The girl scrambled to her feet and turned tail, Leo arriving at his wallet with them already far ahead.

He bent down and picked it up, checking to see all his money was still there. “No point in chasing after them now.” 

“You want me to hang onto that for now?” Niles asked.

“No, no. It won’t happen again.” He looked at Niles and was unable to stop his laughter. His retainer looked ridiculous, his cat themed scarf twisted around his neck and his hair a windblown mess from chasing after the children. This was ridiculous. This was the last thing he expected to be doing, and yet he was unreasonably happy for this. He finally reigned in his laughter to see Niles giving him a wide eyed look.

“What’s so funny?” He asked, a smile playing on the corner of his lips.

“All of this, I suppose. And you! You look frazzled.”

“Well, we did just run through a crowd. I can’t maintain my good looks all the time.” He grinned. “Your headband is crooked.”

“Of course it is…” He muttered, fixing it quickly. “Come on, Niles. We should head back and try some of those Hoshidan sweets.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy. oohhhhh boooy. i dont even know if anyone still is reading this/wants to read this. its been a year. exactly a year. i really went on hiatus with this thing i mean i always intended to come back but a year??? was not in the plan. not to mention im going to be very busy for the next two weeks so the next update probably won't even be in this month. how did i mess up that bad. i really do hope to finish this fic but im not even sure how long its going to be. i dont really have a clear plan in mind and i really want to write past them hooking up. i mean, introduced nina and forrest in this chapter (yes leo referred to forrest as a girl in this chapter cuz he doesnt know) so theyre obviously going to be relevant down the road. i just. idk. if people still want to read this then im going to keep writing this.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing niles with leo and writing niles with anyone else is basically writing for two different characters going by the same name, and that is very very hard

“It’s chewy…” Leo noted as he bit into his newly bought snack. It hadn’t been an ordeal getting back to the stand, but the girl there had laughed at them for a good minute. If only she knew she was conversing with the king of Nohr. “But good. Try it.”

He offered the half bitten mochi to Niles, who didn’t think twice about trying it. He lived off of small moments where he could be closer to Leo. He contemplated the flavor for a moment, rolling the piece of mochi over with his tongue and watching Leo’s tense expression out of the corner of his eye. He licked the powdery residue off his lips. “Not bad, but I prefer my sweets with a bit more of a kick. Can’t say Nohr has ever produced anything like this, though.”

Leo nodded absently before his gaze flickered elsewhere. He cleared his throat. “Well, I bought a few other flavors, so maybe those will be more your style. They didn’t have any tomato flavored ones, though.” The genuine dismay in his voice was both laughable and adorable.

After all the time he had known him, it was finally time to ask the question that had nagged him for years. “Where did your love for tomatoes come from?”

“Where did it come from?” He raised an eyebrow before his face contorted into concentration and then shifted into mild confusion. “I… don’t really know. I didn’t wake up one morning and decide tomatoes were the best things I’ve ever eaten. I don’t even remember the first time I ate one. That sounds like something Camilla would have the answer to, if she ever comes back.” His eyes widened. “I mean, when she comes back. Like she said she would.”

Niles tried to keep his anger at Camilla from showing. “She’ll hold true to her word.”

Leo inhaled deeply. “Let’s not talk about her. I spend enough of my nights staying up worrying about where she could be and what she’s doing. I like to keep my day separate from those thoughts.”

“That’s good. Healthy, even.”

“I’m trying.”

In a softer voice, Niles said, “I know.” He buried his face deeper into the cat scarf he still wore even though it wasn’t all that cold among the crowd.

“I don’t want to go back to the castle yet,” Leo said after a moment of silence. “But we both have things to attend to. It was a short lived trip; we should plan more.”  
“Maybe you won’t get mugged a second time.”

“Maybe. But where’s the fun in that?” Leo smirked. 

And that was what led to them visiting the town in disguise for the next few weeks. Getting in and out of the castle was easy after a while, though Niles had a sneaking suspicion that Sakura already knew what they were up to. If she didn’t, her mind was certainly supplying her with some kind of answer that made her giddy to greet them when she found them later in the day. Leo had taken a liking to the Hoshidan themed food booth and made it common to visit it now. He was smiling more these days, too. Niles didn’t know if it was because he got to step away from his papers for a bit or because he got to be someone normal for once. No title, no crown, no worries. Whatever the reason was, he was glad. Finally, something was going right.

Once or twice, he got a crawl up his back and would turn to see if someone was following them, but there was nothing. He had even led Leo on a winding and confusing path in hopes of revealing their stalker, but all it proved was that he was paranoid. Did he really not trust himself to protect his lord out here?

Around their fifth trip, Leo had a small incident at a cafe they had stopped at. They had settled down at an intimate corner of the cafe at a table and were happily sipping coffee when their waitress began to linger. She swiped a curl of brown hair out of her face and smiled expectantly at Leo as he took another swig of his drink. He caught onto the staring quickly and quirked an eyebrow.

“We aren’t ordering anything else for now, thank you.”

“I was actually wondering what you thought of the coffee. I made the blend myself.”

“Oh. Well in that case, it’s very nice.” He turned his attention back to his drink. Niles watched the girl wilt out of the corner of his eye. She could just walk away and save herself the shame of trying to flirt with an oblivious person, or she could make this all a little more entertaining.

She cleared her throat. “Thank you very much! You seemed like a man of higher tastes and I didn’t want to disappoint, you know? Of course, you don’t act nearly as stuffy as a noble or a king.”

That got Leo’s attention again. “You find the current king stuffy?”

She waved her hand. “Not stuffy, per se. I’m just saying that you’re probably a lot more down to earth and all that. It’s a good quality in a man, the kind I’d look for.” She purred the last part, finally letting Leo catch onto her intentions.

A small blush painted his cheeks. It was undeniably cute, but it forced Niles to hide his smile in the action of drinking his coffee. He didn’t need Leo to know he was enjoying the sight right now. 

Leo set his cup down. “Being down to earth is good for a king, too.”

“Of course, of course! Like I said, it’s a quality I look for in a man, but there’s no king sitting at my table today. Just a veerry handsome commoner.” As she got bolder, her smile got bigger. It was more scary than cute, like she was two steps away from devouring the both of them.

He would have stepped in, but watching Leo squirm uncomfortably for his next words was too perfect. His red cheeks, shy gaze, all of it. It was a moment he would let be imprinted in his mind. Of course, another part of him was becoming wildly jealous that it was some waitress doing this to him rather than, well, Niles himself. He would let this carry only a little further. Just enough to get Leo more flustered.

“Well, um, I can’t really say I know how to answer that,” he said after a moment of floundering. “Thank you?”

“You don’t need to thank me, I’m just stating what I see! Actually, I’m going to be getting off my shift soon if you wanna… head somewhere.” She leaned a little closer.  
Leo mouthed the last two words to himself in confusion before his eyebrows shot up. “I don’t think-”

“Am I going to be invited to this?” Niles interjected, finally tired of being ignored. He made a point to set his coffee down with an audible clink and then looked to Leo instead of the waitress. “It would be so rude of you to just up and leave me here, dear.”

“Dear?” The waitress repeated. Her mouth was skewed down in the corners now that she was acknowledging Niles’ presence. 

Though Leo was still red in the face, he caught on quickly and patted his shirt as if there was an annoying ruffle in it. “You’re completely right, that would be horribly rude of me. I’m afraid I must decline, miss.”

“See? You can leave now.” He waved her away.

“Excuse me?”

“We have more thrilling conversations to hold, as you can tell.” Figuring the woman needed more incentive to leave them alone, he reached across the table and placed his hand over Leo’s, making sure to look her in the eyes while doing so. He didn’t think he wanted to see Leo’s reaction anyway, not if it had the potential to be one of disgust. He would thank him later for shooing away this fly.

She stared down at their hands on the table and she forced her face into neutrality. “I… will leave you to that, then.” She was doing a poor job of hiding her disappointment as she briskly turned away to go back to work while muttering under her breath. He wondered if she often just paused to flirt with cute customers. Either way, he couldn’t judge her too much. Leo was a total catch.

He looked to the king to gauge his reaction, hoping the extended silence hadn’t meant he overstepped his boundaries. Instead, he found him with a faint smile and distant eyes. It would be so easy to read into it and get his hopes up, but he refused.

“We probably should down our coffees,” Niles said, “before we get chased out of here.” He retracted his hand and went back to his drink.

“I don’t think anyone has ever flirted with me with so much boldness,” Leo said after he took up his own drink. “How was I even supposed to respond to that?”

“I believe the only word she was looking for was yes.”

He rolled his eyes.

Niles watched him for a moment, studying the curve of his jaw and the way his hair fell over his eyes. It was getting too long and he left it unkempt when they went out so no one recognized him, but Niles’ wasn’t complaining. The near rugged look suited him. He dared to ask a question he had been considering for some time.

“Do you plan to take a wife? A new queen of Nohr? I haven’t heard anyone rushing you to decide or anything, but I imagine it won’t be long.” He could already see a line of suitors wrapping around both Hoshido and Nohr, eager to get their hands on a piece of royal life. If only they knew the sacrifices it entailed.

Leo sighed. “The thought has crossed my mind as of recent. Obviously I will have to find someone. I won’t deny Nohr the comfort of a queen, and I have to remember that I have a royal bloodline to keep in tact. Gods know where Camilla is now, and any child she bears will be irrelevant unless she reclaims her title as princess.

“I still have plenty of time, I know. It’s just the cherry on the cake at this point.” He kept his head propped up with his hand, staring off into the distance.

Not for the first time, Niles wished he could take Leo by the hand and spirit him away from their draining, dark country.

 

“You keep looking over your shoulder. Is something wrong?” Sakura asked, wringing her delicate hands together.

Niles crossed his arms over his chest. “Not any more than usual.” His normal adventure into the city with Leo had been replaced with Sakura today. Apparently, the king had already told her about what they were doing after their encounter with the waitress at the cafe, and she had insisted on coming when Leo declared he was too busy today. It took several arguments (and one threat) with Hana and Subaki to let her come just with Niles.

“T-that’s good,” she offered a shy smile. Her eyes were wide with wonder as she took in the busy life of Nohr’s underground city. She had been so busy trying to help Leo repair the damaged relationship with Hoshido that she nearly forgot to take in the scene of Nohr for herself. Niles had been expecting a serious case of culture shock from her, but keeping quiet and distant let her blend right in with the Nohrian populace. As long as she didn’t stammer too much or act too polite.  
She cleared her throat. “I was surprised King Leo couldn’t make it today. He always finds time for you nowadays.”

“I hear being king is a busy job,” Niles said absently. Once more, he glanced down the busy street. He kept seeing familiar shadows of his past, sending a chill down his spine and a hollow feeling in his stomach. 

“Y-yeah, but this is you and him, not him and some s-stranger. I think I know what he found.”

Niles glanced at her, not wanting to lose sight of what he thought he was seeing. “A magic cure to all his anxieties? Respect between Nohrians and Hoshidans?”

“Nothing so impossible, no. The Nohrians and Hoshidans who attacked us, many of them got away. I think he found them again.” She twirled a piece of her hair. “T-that’s kind of why I wanted it to just be us talking, today. I-”

“He didn’t mention it to me.” Niles said, nearly stopping in his tracks. “He didn’t say anything about that.”

“I-I know. I told him it’s n-not right, that he can’t protect you by keeping secrets, but he wouldn’t listen. So I thought I’d tell you myself, before he does something dangerous.”   
And Niles knew he would do something dangerous. He remembered the desperate panic in Leo’s eyes after he had woken up from near death, the frantic need to protect what little he had left. He understood entirely what it was like to have something precious snatched away and how it turned everything into an irrational shade of red, but he couldn’t let Leo become that. He was already wildly depressed and anxious; what would this confrontation do? Would he find them by himself and hope his notorious Brynhildr was enough?

All of this over Niles. “Does he know where they are exactly?” He asked.

She shook her head. “He would have told me. He doesn’t think for a second that I might tell you all this.”

Niles saw another familiar person walk past, but it turned into a stranger when they angled their head toward the street light. “Don’t worry, princess. I’ll handle him. I’ll handle all of it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know, i know, my updates have been slow and short, but I cant help it right now. i have to put together a creative writing portfolio for college and im participating in nanowrimo this year, so the next update probably wont be until december. that being said, the angst is gonna pick up again! and I hope you can all stick with me through these horrendous breaks lol. if any of you want to contact me about this or chapter progress, my user on tumbler is pick-a-fig-and-pray. idk where most leoniles fans hang out so hit me up lol


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did say there would be an update in december and! i have not lied! honestly the late nights i pull with this fic are ridiculous i didnt even MARRY one of these guys (thats reserved for mah boi kaden) but here i am slaving away for shippy feels and trying to keep accurate characterization lol

Sakura regretted telling Niles that Leo had found the people who attacked them. Just because Leo found them didn’t mean he could kick right off into action and it was obvious with each passing day that Niles was on edge, waiting just for that. It brought up a strain, a tension, that Leo couldn’t have predicted and it was clearly throwing the king for a loop. More than once she caught him with a pondering look when Niles left their presence to attend to other work with too little fanfare, no doubt repeating his latest words to figure out where he misstepped. Everything had been fine, getting better, why did she have to open her mouth? Now Niles was desperately waiting for Leo to tell him he found those men and Leo was hanging on the edge of every word left between them.

She really mucked things up, didn’t she? One thing she did better than messing things was beating herself up, and her sulky nature was caught by her retainers instantly. Subaki told her not to worry about it, everyone messed up sometimes (except him) and Hana readily offered the statement that it wasn’t her problem to begin with. She wasn’t here to play matchmaker, she was here to soothe Hoshidan and Nohrian relations. But Sakura hadn’t been able to help herself, not when she thought Leo was going to get hurt and hurt Niles in return, and she hastily concluded what she needed to do.

She need not have done anything. It left her whole trip with Niles as a stinging, bitter venture, especially when his interest completely waned to glancing behind them and flinching at every shadow. Oh, and how she had been looking forward to it! Leo described the marketplace as if it were a foreign third country, especially when Hoshidan seeds were taking root. Yes, Nohr was shady (as Takumi loved to remind her) and yes it was dangerous (as her retainers drilled into her head) but there was still impossible wonder at looking a little more closely into the shadow country she had feared for so long. Besides, many people described Princess Elise as the sweetest thing. If something so kind could bloom here, then there was hope and light to be held.

“You look distracted,” Leo observed. “That’s very unlike you, Princess Sakura.”

“I-I’m sorry! I was just… sorry.” She forced her eyes down at the papers before her. Numbers, letters, it all jumbled around. Understanding how Nohr ran itself was important, but it was times like these when she wished Ryoma had chosen Takumi or Hinoka as a diplomat. Cracking numbers was so not her style.

Leo placed down the paper he was holding. “Were you thinking of Hoshido? You probably miss your siblings.”

She blinked a few times, caught off guard by the words. She was always thinking of home. The brightness, the smell of cherry blossoms, the pegasi squadrons flying by and practicing harmless loops. Some of that image had been marred by the war-- the luscious red of Hoshido turning into dark scarlet on the tips of her arrows and clothes, but her mind could mostly keep it intact. The nightmares weren’t so bad anymore when she let time and patience carry them away.

“I do miss them, yes. I send letters but it’s... not the same.” She smiled softly. “I-I’m sure I’ve told you a million times how much you remind me of Takumi.”

“That is something I begrudgingly remember, yes.”

She giggled. “Well, I like that. It doesn’t make home feel so far. A-And it helps to think that when I do come home, everyone will be proud of the work I’ve done for my country.” She closed her eyes, picturing Corrin’s warm embrace and Ryoma’s firm hand on her shoulder. She didn’t want to sound prideful or obnoxious, but she couldn’t wait for that. Mostly, she couldn’t wait to be with them again.

When she opened her eyes she found herself regretting her words again. Leo was smiling but it was pained and his knuckles white. “B-b-but! Being in Nohr is nicer than I thought and it’s all thanks to you, King Leo. I’m happy we’ve become friends. You’re… you’re doing a wonderful job.” And she meant it, even if it sounded corny.

“Thank you, Sakura.” The words were genuine but when he looked back down at his paper his eyes were much more tired, like years had gone past that froze him to the spot with no rest in between.

She glanced outside a nearby window. “The day is early. M-maybe you can take a break. Speak with Niles, perhaps?”

“Niles,” he repeated, and it wasn’t a question or a growl or something of displeasure. A hint of frustration, but ultimately fond. “I don’t think he wants much to do with me as of late.”

Sakura smiled, but it was too much teeth. “Oh, and why would you say that?”

He shrugged, leafing through documents. “It was like there was a switch. Consistently, when I could manage the freetime, we would go out and enjoy ourselves for a bit, as you know. And then suddenly there was… tension. Nothing obvious, it never is with him, but he keeps looking at me funny. Expectantly. I don’t know what I said and now I feel as if I can’t ask anything beyond normal duties. It was shortly after you went out with him. Did something happen? Did he say something?”

“N-nothing to me, sorry. Everything carried on normally. But if there really is a problem, you should talk it out.”

Leo sighed. “I know. Miscommunication is an abhorrent thing. Still, I won’t leave you to yourself, not when there are other things that still need work.”

“I can handle it for a bit.”

He gave her an apologetic but ultimately thankful look before rising to his feet. He turned to leave but an extra question nagged at the back of her mind.

“Leo? I need to know… what do you plan to do about those men now that you’ve found them?” Her voice was barely above a whisper.

He didn’t look back at her. “I’m not sure,” he admitted. “I’m really not sure.”

 

 

Leo found Niles in the stables of all places, having been directed there by one of the servants he passed by. He must have finished what Leo asked of him because he couldn’t imagine his retainer shirking any duty, no matter how dreadful or boring. He spied him leaning against the front of the stall, one hand gently patting the side of a horse’s head. Leo’s horse. He had been painfully neglectful, he would admit, and he took an extra second to himself to observe the calmness of his horse and Niles’ soft, distant expression.

Warmth welled in his heart at the scene. He chalked it up to the fact that it was rare to see Niles like this, so perfectly pulled out of the shadows and relaxed from head to toe. He deserved these kind of moments more than anyone, especially from Leo. He had fought a war by his side and watched half the royal family fall only to immediately help Leo pick up the pieces of himself that were lost. He had taken wounds, fatal and some not so, and reserved so much of his mental capacity just for him. It was more than a retainer, a friend, should be asked of. It was more than choice. He didn’t want to sounds too much like Corrin, gods forbid, but Niles was certainly someone he was always fated to come across.

He couldn’t spy forever, though. He didn’t need to risk adding another flaw to his arsenal, so he stepped out of his hiding spot into plain view with heavy steps so as to not spook Niles or the horse.

Niles pulled away from the animal and straightened his back. “Milord,” he greeted. 

Leo wanted to answer back with his own happy hello (he would dissect why he was always so happy to see Niles above others later) but the words were stuck in his throat. There was that lingering expectancy in his gaze again and Leo had no idea what he wanted. “What are you searching for?” He asked instead.

Niles tilted his head. “What do you mean?”

“It’s just… you’ve been acting odd lately. Is something wrong?” He looked elsewhere. “Did I do something wrong?”

The silence dragged on for too long. “No, nothing is wrong. I think I’ve just been more tired as of late. I apologize if I worried you at all.”

That wasn’t the truth, clearly, but he wasn’t going to press anymore. Leo merely shook his head and walked up to his horse, running his hand down the long snout. He wished more than anything that his horse brought back fond memories, but too often he had seen its hide painted with enemy and ally blood alike. He thought he saw something different in its eyes too. Emptiness. 

“Poor, broken creature,” he muttered. “You used to be such a flighty thing. Now you seem so numb to it all.” It was like someone had hit the panic button too many times, leaving it stuck and useless. “I wonder if it’s humane to keep them trapped in here like this.”

He saw Niles shift closer to him and the horse out of the corner of his eye. “If there were nothing to salvage I’d say so. But I visit often enough and I’ve seen improvement.” His hand grazed Leo’s as he moved to pet the horse’s cheek. “Like all good things, it comes with time.”

Leo forced himself to not linger on the slight touch. He wouldn’t be caught blushing over something so silly, not now. “Then I should put more effort in.”

“Luckily, we’ve all the time in the world. Now, not that I don’t enjoy every second of your company milord, but were you looking for me for a specific reason?”

“Princess Sakura recommended a break and well, I thought we could get back up to our usual shenanigans. It’s been a while, and I really do feel like I’m getting to know Nohr better even if it is through such a small portion.”

He needn’t have tagged on more excuses for Niles was just as eager as him to go back out into the bustling city. The tension had mostly dissipated halfway through their walk, like Niles gave up searching or holding onto whatever it was. Leo would have to get an answer sooner or later. The last thing he needed was a wedge between them that he couldn’t remove.

It was easy to lose his worries among common folk. It had become his meditation, his tea, and inhaling the scent of dozens shouldn’t have been so refining. He knew what this place was like from a young age, but war had taught him that if so many people were going to be packed in one place then it was for violence, not trade and commodities. Things were improving too, if a bit slowly. He had dealt with loopholes in his previous anti-discrimination laws when it came to Hoshidans to make their incoming trade easier and stood by it even when there was rumbles of backlash. 

The woman selling Hoshidan sweets said her business was looking up too. Curious passersby became frequent customers (though no more frequent than Niles and Leo himself) and the sneering died down. He had been alarmed that someone accused ‘her people’ of causing the deaths of Xander and Elise, but that had only been once. His mind was not suited to pressing blame because it would always, and unfairly, go back to Corrin. Walking around the city was not a time to think about Corrin.  
Post their normal visit to the sweets seller, tension returned to Niles in a crashing wave as they meandered through the thick crowd. Leo stiffened, knowing this wasn’t the same tension directed at him earlier but the kind any retainer let out when there were too many variables around their lord. He kept his glancing subtle but he couldn’t spot what Niles caught.

“Should we leave?” He asked.

“I - oh.” Leo followed his line of sight to two young, familiar faces. The girls who had stolen his wallet. “Well, not as big a threat as I thought. Not big at all.”

“Except for my wallet,” Leo patted his side, and though he felt the coin purse there he found something else absent. In his haste to leave with Niles he had completely forgotten to bring Brynhildr along. His safety net and only real means of defense, even if it meant outing who he was. “If I’m not mistaken they’re looking directly at us. Do they want something?”

“Your money.”

Leo snorted.

They approached slowly as if they hadn’t seen the pair at all, but once they got close enough to speak the girls scampered off. Not far enough that they lost sight of them, but into a looser part of the crowd.

“They want us to follow,” said Leo. “It doesn’t seem like a good idea.”

“We should turn back.”

“But what if they need help? They’re just children.”

“I hate to remind you of how tough the children of Nohr are, Leo, but they really are. There’s a war of its own happening here.”

“Then we’ll be extremely on our guard.” He begrudgingly realized he was reminding himself of Camilla, bleeding heart that she was. “And turn back at the first sign of danger.” He looked Niles up and down, scanning for latent injuries in a habitual way. He wouldn’t risk him if he didn’t think it was worth it.

Niles seemed to know that because he didn’t argue further and led the way after the girls. They chased at their own pace, the slowest game of cat and mouse until the crowd weaned away and the streets became tighter and dingier. It was when they were cut off from the noise of the crowd that Leo knew they were wrong to have followed. He stopped walking after them, though they were paces ahead, and Niles stopped beside him.

“Where are you headed?” Leo called out, his eyes darting back and forth. There were too many blind spots and he wasn’t armed.

They both turned around. The girl with the braids spoke in a voice too mature for someone her age, “Why don’t you come and find out?” She was clearly the leader of the two, though her partner didn’t stand meekly behind her for what it was worth.

“We’d rather stay here,” Niles responded.

They’re just two girls, Leo reminded himself. “Your name is Nina, right?” He recalled the other girl calling out to her when she tripped.

Her face scrunched up. “Your friend there is Niles, right?” She said in a mocking tone.

“How did you-” But the words didn’t finish leaving his mouth before people were dropping on them from nowhere. It was dozens, or maybe just a handful, but he had been targeted first and his head hit the pavement with a resounding crack before either of them could register what was happening. He cried out, in pain or shock he didn’t know, and struggled against the person who gripped his arms and pinned him down with a knee stuck painfully to his back.

Niles had said his name and there was more fighting, but he wasn’t privy to any of it from his angle. At least all he heard were knives, no tomes or bows to enter the fray. The fighting petered out and he heard a frustrated growl from Niles. The panic in his chest should have been enough to make him move the planet or rain the hell of dragons upon their attackers but it didn’t. He was still stuck and his head still rippling with the after effects of being struck. 

Not Niles. Not again. He couldn’t afford this, not after all this time (why had he insisted they come?) and not after all this progress. He reached for words but they wouldn’t come. He gagged for breath but it didn’t come. Sakura wouldn’t magically save them, nothing could save them and he couldn’t even save himself and-

Another cry. But not Niles. Niles was a fighter, yes, and he had to fight, for both of them. His ears were ringing and someone was speaking in the background.

“Niles,” the name was purred by someone he didn’t know, a viper. He hated the way this woman said his name, like he was an object or a tool. Or maybe like he was an old acquaintance. Either was unacceptable because he knew Niles and he knew what Niles’ past was molded from and nothing that stepped forward from it would ever be okay.  
Dammit, he couldn’t protect Niles like this.

He wiggled and thrashed as much as his body would let him, daring to stoop so low as to beg for mercy for Niles, when the person above him snatched a handful of his hair to lift his head up and smack him back to the ground. The ringing was deafening. No, it wasn’t ringing, someone was screaming, and it might have been him. The pain didn’t even matter when panic was consuming him like a blight.

Niles said his name again. But that was a dangerous name to utter out here. His hearing must be lying to him, Niles would never put him in danger like that. He heard the woman speak again but he was sure this was real because her voice shook the world around him and broke through the pain.

“Oh Niles, I never knew you were so eager to come back to us. Are you done warming the king’s bed, done being his pet? Because I have a favor of you, just like all those years ago.”

His will deflated. His mind wandered in and out of consciousness. 

“Maybe it’s not a favor, sort of a trade. We never finished that job all those years ago, did we? You must see the royal coffers everyday now. We’d like to see them too, and then you can see whoever your new lovely companion is here. We’ll know when you’re ready when you come back here. And,” she laughed the way Camilla did before she was about to tear an enemy limb from limb, “if you take too long, there will be plenty of people who would pay good money for a pretty face.”  
He could laugh at that, really. His face was probably not his best feature right now. 

He heard Niles’ voice, unclear and murky among a sea of clouds. He would much rather hear his voice than this wretch. She responded but it was equally unclear. Everything was losing itself to a shadow in the back of his mind. His sight, his hearing, his touch. It was fading, slipping, and then finally gone.

 

 

Sakura stared out the window of her guest room mournfully. So she had encourage Leo to take a break with Niles and smooth things over, but she hadn’t meant take the whole day. Night had long since set in and there was no sign of them. Maybe something nice had happened and they were indulging in each other’s time. Maybe something horrible had happened and they had an argument. A real one, with tears and yelling like the ones Hinoka and Takumi had sometimes.

She wasn’t good at staying up late waiting for other people, she knew that, but she sat herself in a chair in the library anyway because she knew Leo was bound to come here first before he slept. The chair was too big for, fit for someone like Ryoma, but it gave enough leeway for lounging. She would try to stay awake, just for them and her own curiosity.  
She failed and fell asleep within the next hour. It wasn’t dawn and her internal clock that woke her next, but a sudden itch in her sleep that told her someone else was there. She flinched awake to see a tall shadow figure across from her, the windows offering no natural light and her candle long since snuffed. She screeched and nearly fell out of the chair before her eyes adjusted to the sight of Niles.

He was shaking from head to toe and covered in rainwater from an unexpected storm that rolled through. She couldn’t see any immediate injuries but her mind went into full medic mode and she watched the way he held himself and the stiffness of his shoulders.

“N-Niles, what’s wrong? Has Leo returned with you?”

The water that dripped off his bangs onto his face looked like tear stains. It wasn’t fitting for a man of as much pride and smoke as him.

With a sharp inhale and a shaky voice he said, “I need your help. To save Leo.”

And she knew that things had dipped from horrible to horrific.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof this was fun. i love writing angst but dont love reading angst in fic, isnt that weird? i feel like this was a nice sized update for me too so i hope that holds up for a bit so i can... write my other leoniles fic lol someone make me stop.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my plan to update once a month is not going great, but at least fire emblem warriors is giving me that sweet sweet leoniles content

Leo was dreaming. He was dreaming of the castle in a warmer light, like the sunshine of Hoshido, and his family was there. His retainers, their retainers. Xander had never looked happier to talk with Elise, who bounced from heel to toe with incredible energy. Corrin and Camilla chatted like a pair of old souls while their retainers entertained themselves with their normal shenanigans. Odin, Laslow, and Selena were all there, like they weren’t gone for good.

He was dreaming, but he wasn’t a part of the dream. He called for the attention of his siblings and tried to shake them, but there was no response. He searched their eyes for any indication that they saw him and saw only vacancy. A shadowy figure leaning on the nearby wall caught his attention.

“Niles?” He said, too afraid to know if he could see him or not.

“Is everything well, milord?” He asked.

Leo sighed and leaned against the wall next to him. “They don’t see me. Why don’t they see me?”

Niles shrugged. “Is it important that they do?”

“Of course it is! That’s… they’re my everything. And I can’t even coax a hello.” He frowned as he watched Xander scold Laslow for flirting with one of the girls. 

“As long as they’re happy, is it important?”

Leo turned to look at Niles. Normally he would have scolded him for moving so close, but now he was at a loss for words. “That’s a cruel thing to say…” He murmured, forcing himself to meet Niles’ gaze. His eye was so much more blue than he recalled. And should his lips really be that close to his own? “But I suppose it holds some truth. At least I have you.”

“For now,” Niles mused.

“What?” The panic that seized Leo was too real to keep him grounded in the dream. “What?” He said again as the edges of his vision blurred into darkness. He was suddenly very aware of the cold ground against his skin and the pains that riddled his body. When he opened his eyes he was met with the orange glow of flame and rusted bars guarding him from the outside.

He sat up slowly, finding his arms and legs bound together. There wasn’t much space in his cell for him to move about and no windows to the outside world, but there was a woman and the girls from earlier standing on the other side of the bars. He gritted his teeth, feeling the aches swarm his head and body. The dream was far from his mind now as he stared the three of them down.

He needed to get out of here alive, and get back to Niles. Because Leo couldn’t bear the thought of abandoning him for good.

 

 

Niles was living a nightmare. There had been many times when he thought this was true, of course. As a child forced to do horrendous things, then as a thief caught at the hands of authorities, and later as a member of a war he didn’t even care much for. All of that didn’t compare to losing Leo. Whatever pain he went through couldn’t elicit the same fear and panic that he felt now for him.

He hated that he couldn’t even remember the woman who had been talking. So much of his past was mentally walled up to protect him that she barely registered as familiar. She certainly was part of the people that left him behind that fateful day in the castle, but he couldn’t place a name or a personality to her. He didn’t want to risk what few contacts he had from the slums in asking either, knowing that if he tampered around with the rules she set, Leo would likely end up hurt. 

He was going to kill her regardless of familiarity. If he gave her the money or rescued Leo in time, it didn’t matter. He was going to decorate the floor with her and everyone who helped her. The children didn’t matter; if they got in his way again then they would go down too. Anything to get Leo back.

He and Sakura were lucky that Leo was such a private king. They mentioned to a few servants that he was sick and would be attending to his work in his quarters, which were now guarded by Hana or Subaki depending on the time of day. This left them both with time to track down the group that took him, even though every ticking hour came up just as empty as the last. It had been two days now. Was it two days too many? How much time had they really given him?

“You said those kids were bound to show up again, right?” Sakura murmured next to him. They were scouring the city once more even though previous efforts brought up nothing new.

“Part of living in the slums of Nohr is working multiple jobs at once. They’ll surface soon enough,” he explained. And if not, he was going to drop every coin Nohr had at their feet to get him back. It’s not like he cared for what happened to the money too much. The country would gain it back just as quick, especially with the slow growing and prosperous trade between them and Hoshido.

But giving them the money would also mean making them pleased and winning, which he was less inclined to. He didn’t want this woman and her gang to draw any inch of pleasure from this if he could help it. The pleasure was his to have, and only at the sight of her face in agony would it be gained.

He brought his hand up to his temple to rub away at his growing headache. Sleep deprivation and hunger hadn’t hit him quite yet, he was used to the strenuous days of the war and his childhood, but his stress was aggravating the minor details of poor self care more than he was used to.

He caught Sakura glancing at him, no doubt seeing the problem right away with her trained eyes. He dared her to make a comment about his well being and tell him to stop. Just one word would be an excuse enough for him to snap.

Instead, her gaze fell forward and she held her head a little higher. “Then we’ll be one step closer to finding King Leo.”

Niles sighed. “If you’re pretending to be optimistic and confident for me, don’t bother. It’s useless.”

“I-I’m not pretending. I know things will work out, somehow.”

“Must be a nice thing to know…” he muttered. For someone like Sakura, things have always worked out. She lost Corrin but got her back and was on the winning side of the war. Her siblings were alive and well, and even if she lost her mother she had them to look out for her. Niles refrained from teasing her like normal because she was a princess and Hoshido and Nohr still had a tentative relationship. But for people like him and Leo? Things didn’t simply work out. Things didn’t end happily.

The day wasted from their grasp with no new leads or clues. The girls hadn’t shown up once, even when Niles and Sakura split to cover more ground. They agreed to go back to the castle to get a few hours of rest before trying again at dawn, but he knew there would be no real sleep.

He didn’t really deserve sleep, he decided once he was in his quarters and watching the clock tick down. His body didn’t even ache for it the way he thought it would, and he was left sitting by himself while staring into nothing. He used the isolation to comb through his mind for answers and details. Some memories were so close to clawing their way up that he could almost feel them, and then they were lost again. He knew he hadn’t really been living (he hadn’t been much of anything) before Leo, but this brought it all forward.  
Waiting for the dawn hours was too much. He knew the castle better than guards or Hoshidan visitors and snuck his way back into the city, undetected. Every sense was on edge, especially by himself, as he wandered through the streets with his hood pulled up. He wasn’t a devout man by any means, but even he could feel desperation tugging a prayer out of his heart. A useless thing for a useless retainer.

He tuned in and out of the conversations passing him by, keeping his head low and his back to a building. A chirpy little voice caught his attention and he slowly raised his head, making sure the shadow of his hood kept his face covered. He saw the back of her head and the pale braids and knew his weak prayer had been answered.   
The girl, the one he knew as Nina, had no clue she was being followed that night. She didn’t see the shadow that lingered in hers as she made her way through heavy pockets and secret doorways. She didn’t think there was anyone to hide her yawning from or the money she counted in dark alleys.

But even with Niles’ patience and the hours of night dragging to day, he knew she wasn’t going to lead him to wherever Leo was. She might not even know. Her job was probably just to lure them away and end it there. Not that he was going to let her go, but he was about done aimlessly following the street orphan around. He waited until she was alone and the growing morning market was distracted before cornering her behind a building.

She nearly dropped the coin purse she was rifling through. “You,” her voice came out as a sharp growl. Or, as much of a growl as she could have as a child.

“You and I have business,” he said. He wasn’t in the mood for his normal teasing and games. She stepped back. “Don’t think about running. You won’t even have a chance to scream.”

Nina narrowed her eyes. “Please, you aren’t the first person to threaten me.”

“I make good on my threats, little girl, but I am also offering prices.” He pointed to the coin purse. “A hefty deal more than that.”

She glanced down at it and then their surroundings. “I’m listening, but not here.”

“Of course not. I have a place in mind.”

The walk might have been an awkward thing to her, but he relished in the moment. Finally, one step closer to getting Leo back. He would take anything at this point. One slip, one whisper that could bring him to his goal.

Nina glanced around their new location. “A graveyard?” He caught the tremble in her voice.

“A place of cautionary tales and fate.” He crossed his arms. “I want to know everything you do.”

Her gaze snapped back to him and away from a nearby tombstone. “And I want to know price first.”

“I imagine they promised you and your other friend a share of what they would get from me. Probably not much, since your part was simple and you’re children, but enough to keep you satisfied.” He smiles when he sees her look elsewhere. “The funny thing is, I’m the one in charge of all that money. The gold that the Nohrian royalty has guarded for generations like ferocious dragons. If you help me find the man they took I can give you so much more than their percents.”

She crossed her arms in a position similar to his. “All this for one guy? He must be some friend. What if my information isn’t good enough?”

“It better be, Nina.” He leaned against a particularly tall tombstone as he watched her. “You’ll spend every breath on making sure it is, if it isn’t already. Tell me where he is.”

“How can I be sure I’m gonna get anything out of this? You could be lying. It’s not like it’s hard.”

“Are you sure that other little friend of yours won’t notice your absence? I’m not giving you much of a choice. And certainly your group will find out that you were talking to me, which puts you both in trouble, so you’re really going to want me to eliminate them for your safety now.”

He struck a nerve in mentioning her friend. Her gaze went from uncertain to fierce and her hands tightened into small fists. “I don’t know much about them,” she confessed. “They approached us. I guess they saw us when we stole your friend’s wallet. I’m actually the one who was supposed to collect the money from you when you were ready.”

“They’d trust some kid they don’t know with that?”

She shrugged. “They trust me enough. Forrest is with them, too, but everytime I meet up with him he tells me they moved to a new location with your friend.”

“Forrest?”

“That’s who you saw me with before.”

Well, he hadn’t expected that kid to be a boy with those curls, but he didn’t really care. “Then, he really is at risk. They’re using him to make sure you don’t go back on the deal.”

“Yeah, so you better hold up this deal. They’ve probably already moved again today, so I can’t tell you where they are, but I’m meeting with Forrest tomorrow. If you come back I can tell you exactly where they are and we can both walk out of this happy.”

Niles nodded. “We’ll meet here then.”

“At sundown.”

“At sundown,” he repeated. “But tell me the places you know they’ve been to before I leave.” Nina listed them off easily and left with a shake of his hand. He was going to find Leo, and nothing was going to get in his way.

 

 

The last places the criminals had stayed at were as poor and dilapidated as he expected. They were the rotting shells of homes with moth bitten rags covering broken windows. There were no signs they had been there. No chains to show where they might have held Leo, no leftover supplies. They were thorough.

He wondered what it was like to travel with them. His memories were still so spotty and awful that forcing himself to dive into them made him nauseous. He had grown soft and plump on the care Leo gave him. The warm bed, the safe walls, the knowledge that if he was hurt someone would come to heal him. He understood the disgust Leo had shown when they first came to the city and closer to the slums, and yet some part of his heart wanted it back. These horrible things were his nostalgia.

It was a very small and shriveled part of his heart that longed for it, and it was easy to ignore. It was easy to ignore everything when Leo was present in that same heart.   
He returned to the castle a little past midday, the aching need for sleep crawling through his bones and resting under his eyes. He turned the corner of a familiar hall, eager for a nap, and nearly bumped into Sakura.

“Oh! Niles, there you are!” Her face was entirely red and her hands were clasped tightly together. “Thank the gods you’re safe. When I woke I couldn’t find you sleeping and you weren’t around anywhere else. I even went into the city to search for you this morning but it was hopeless!” He was surprised to find her tearing up. “I thought that you were gone for good, missing. You could have been injured out there and I’d have no clue. You aren’t injured, are you?”

“Calm down, Lady Sakura. I’m right here and perfectly sound.” He didn’t know what he would do if her tears became full waterworks.

“B-but you don’t understand! I was so worried about you. I feel absolutely sick to my stomach thinking about how Leo is out there. I don’t know what I would do if you were, too!” She wiped out her eyes. “Please, we have to work together to find him. Please don’t leave me out of this.”

Shame wasn’t something that often wiggled its way into Niles’ palette of emotions, but seeing Sakura in such a messy state because of him brought it tenfold. He had worried her to tears. And these weren’t tears she deserved. She was crying because he had left her out of finding a person she no doubt considered a friend and because he disappeared. Because he disappeared.

He rested a hand on her trembling shoulder. “I promise I won’t ever do something like that again. Finding Leo is an effort between the two of us. But I have learned something very important while I was gone that I must tell you.”

She placed her hand over his. “You can tell me once you’ve rested. A-and I think I need to sit down for a moment.” A smile broke through the tears. “You keep startling me, you know.”

He smiled, too. “My apologies, Lady Sakura. I’ll be better about alerting you of my presence. Come now.”

The people Niles’ wanted to protect were a small, but growing, population, and there were still apologies to be given. Soon, when Leo would be back to walking these halls with them, he would let them out. 

Soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> special shoutout to the people who comment on my chapters!! whenever i get into a writing slump i just read them over again. they really help in keeping me writing this, so thank you all very much!! <3


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